Thought Catalog

14 Extremely Personal Things Your ‘Emotionally Strong’ Friend Needs You To Know

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Whether you are that friend or you have that friend in your life, being a “strong” person can hold a lot of weight. You are essentially a lot of people’s rock and are expected to stay solid in some of the most tragic situations. In reality, sometimes you need someone to lean on, too. Here are some things that emotionally “strong” people need you to know about them.
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1. We are strong because we have been through a lot. Sometimes we don’t tell you what we have been through, but trust us – you don’t get tough skin from staying out of the rain.

2. It can get really frustrating when your friends look at you like you have two heads when you actually get upset about something. Bad stuff happens to us, too, and we would like you to be there for us just as much as we are there for you.

3. We aren’t afraid of change. You’d be surprised at how flexible we can be, whether it’s a last minute change of plans or a drastic life change. We thrive on being able to be challenged. Don’t question us when we decide to quit our jobs for an exciting new path – because if we’ve set our mind to it, we’re going to do it

4. People just expect us to know how to react in various different situations, but sometimes we don’t quite know what to do. It can be intimidating to have these expectations – whether they are set in reality or in our own minds. Sometimes we just don’t know, and we are okay with that because we have the strength to understand that it will all work out in the end. You should have that confidence in us, too.

5. We are so afraid that if we do show emotion, people will judge us for being weak, because it is out of our character to be anything but indestructible. We won’t let our vulnerabilities show themselves unless it is really something that breaks us apart.

6. On that note – we have the ability to break down harder than most of your friends. We hold in all of our feelings and your feelings for so long that sometimes it can all come crashing down harder than you’d expect.

7. Truth be told: we care so much. We might not always care what strangers or the world thinks about us, but we do care about what the people who mean most to us think. We care about you, your thoughts, your happiness, and how our lives can intertwine together peacefully.

8. We want to hear about your life, your drama, your fight with your roommates, about that guy that you just went on a date with…but we also want to share those aspects of our life with you, too. Friendship is a two way street, and we expect you to hear us out on our latest issues despite how well we can handle them on our own. We want to give you the scoop!

9. While we strive to comfort those around us, as we are natural nurturers – we want to celebrate with you, too. If you only keep us around to divulge your problems, we will break away.

10. Sometimes we are not able to be there for you. Whether it is physically or emotionally, whether it is out of pure forgetfulness or maybe even moral reasoning – sometimes it is just not possible for us to be there for you. There are times where lessons need to be learned and it will make you a more independent, strong person. We know this because we have been through it in some way, shape or form. Just because we are not able to help, doesn’t mean that we don’t want to, necessarily. So, please don’t get mad if we can’t always be there.

11. We’re always focused on how we can develop ourselves to be better people. Our expectations on what would make our lives better are only set by us – not you, not society, not anyone or anything. We are strong because we discipline ourselves to hold tight to our values and beliefs we have set for ourselves.

12. Don’t take offense if we don’t take your advice. Some of us are wildly independent, whether it is by nature or from experience. It doesn’t mean we don’t care about your thoughts or having you there for us in a difficult situation; it just means that what you suggested might not be a viable option for us. Thank you, nonetheless.

13. Our reactions aren’t cold – they’re realistic. In most situations, we see things in a very logical way. If we come off as blunt or cold, it’s just because we know what the answer is, point blank.

14. Sometimes a strong person needs a hug, too. It may not seem like it, but it’s pretty safe to say that most people like hugs…and we’re included in that. TC mark

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  • Heather

    This isn’t just for the 20 somethings :)

  • http://tvgeekingout.wordpress.com lkeke35

    Well said.
    As the oldest of five, I’ve found myself in the position you stated, and yeah, strong people need to be shown love, too.

  • http://kianapatricia.wordpress.com K

    Reblogged this on KPCN and commented:
    “We hold in all of our feelings and your feelings for so long that sometimes it can all come crashing down harder than you’d expect.”

  • https://thewhiteowldotme.wordpress.com/2015/08/27/strong-able-to-withstand-force-pressure-or-wear/ Strong: able to withstand force, pressure or wear.  | The White Owl

    […] read this and it hit the nail on the head so frickin hard I actually blushed a couple of times. Always […]

  • http://shannondoahh.wordpress.com Shannondoah

    People don’t hug enough. Human contact is so taboo nowadays. “Omigosh I touched his hand by accident.” We crave that touch, nay need it! Good job!

  • http://matterofspeach.wordpress.com andreaspinheiro

    Dude yes ! I wanna share this on fb

  • http://juniegraceamodia.wordpress.com Junieee

    Reblogged this on juniegraceamodia.

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    […] article (14 Extremely Personal Things Your ‘Emotionally Strong’ Friend Needs You To Know) linked by owlieme is written with the goal of educating the takers about the toll it takes on the […]

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