She Doesn’t Just ‘Get Over You’

She doesn’t just “get over you.”

She may act like it in front of her friends. She’ll even say she’s better off without you.

She’ll post quotes on Instagram and Facebook claiming her power. Posting song lyrics that reference how she’s better off without you.

She’ll smile brighter and laugh ten times louder. She’ll probably do something different to her hair or change the way she dresses.

She’ll keep herself busy on the weekends. She’ll walk around the office with her head held high.

But what you don’t know is that she isn’t actually over it. She may think she has this all under control and can fool everyone. But no one can get over someone that quickly.

All she wants is to stop putting on this front. But she doesn’t want to show she’s weak. She doesn’t want you to know that you completely crushed her confidence. She doesn’t want you to know that part of her is gone.

What you don’t know is that at night, she cries. She cries before she goes to bed and she cries in the shower where no one can hear her. She stares at her phone, hoping to see a text from you. She leaves space where you use to sleep next to her in her bed.

She’ll have “I Could Use A Love Song” by Maren Morris on repeat – for days. Wondering how, in this crazy world, she’ll ever be able to find someone to love again.

What you don’t know is that the girl who perceives herself as so strong, is in fact broken inside. She may still be whole, but her poor heart has been crushed.

At night she prays to get over it. She prays really hard. She wishes she could let go of the memories. But when you spend so much time with someone, it’s hard to just let go.

In order to ‘get over you,’ she has to let the old memories fade.

She tells herself this over and over: slowly but surely the memories will start to fade away as long as you let them – as much as it hurts. There will be certain moments where you don’t think you can let go but that’s when you have to trust yourself that letting go is the only option to officially move on.  

You’ll have to “fake it, until you make it” as they say.  

But one day you won’t be faking it any longer.

You will smile brighter. You will laugh louder. You will have a glow about you. You will be happy again.  And you will find love in this crazy mixed up world.