It’s okay to be sad sometimes. Being sad doesn’t mean you’re broken. It doesn’t mean you’ll never feel happiness again. Sometimes sadness comes from a source. Sometimes you wake up and there is just this heavy weight on your heart and unexplained sadness.
We all try to hide and bury our sadness, shield it from those around us. Sometimes setting it to the side can help, but ignoring it is what breaks us. You need to let it consume you for a minute, but then you fight. Every breath you fight for will make you stronger. You will finally heal.
It’s okay to grieve, to cry because of loss, to cry because it hurts. Crying helps us realize just how real those emotions are and that we are still living. It doesn’t mean you’ll do it forever, but it’s the start of healing. I’m not saying it won’t hurt—it will hurt like hell. You will be shaking on the floor, gasping for every breath, wishing and praying for it to be over. You will feel like the pain will never fade, that the anger will always burn hot, but it won’t. I know it’ll rest in your bones. But it doesn’t have to stay there, okay? It won’t stay there if you let yourself feel it. Let the pain in.
Healing won’t be easy; it never is. On the harder days of healing, you will feel like you are swimming against the current. You will feel broken, damaged, and just lost. Getting out of bed will be hard; eating and even sleeping for some people will be impossible tasks. You will spend late nights racking your brain on what you did wrong, wondering how you will ever move on from this. It doesn’t feel like it at the time, but you will. One day you will wake up and be able to get out of bed. Your heart won’t be as heavy. And those are the days you fight like hell for.
Each day is progress. Some moments will be harder, they will make you question if you can do this, but you can. You will not always be in pain. The scar from this will become a reminder of how you bravely survived, of how you continued to move forward when all you wanted to do was give up. Healing is a pain, but it is also joy. Healing isn’t just sobbing on the bathroom floor at midnight. Healing is being able to look at yourself in the mirror again, that first genuine smile after days of heartbreak. Every breath that you fought for will make you that much stronger, will make the fight mean that much more to you in the end.
Just know that no matter what pain or heartache you are enduring, it won’t be like this forever. The sadness won’t dig so deep, the anger won’t burn so hot. Eventually, it will subside, you’ll begin to heal. And you will be okay again. You will be you again.