Sometimes God feels untouchable, like this giant force in the sky we can only see when we close our eyes, like something so removed and distant, it’s like He’s not there at all. Sometimes I feel like I’m just this tiny speck of dust on the earth, so impossibly small. Why would He ever take notice of me? How could He use this body, this soul—one of millions upon millions—for His purpose?
Have you ever felt that way? You want to understand who He is, want to deepen your faith, but He feels so far away. You want to believe that He sees you, hears you, knows you, but you look in the mirror and wonder if you’re selfish to think He even pays you mind. You ask yourself why He would care about you, or what you could possibly do when you’re just one small collection of cells on this Earth.
In this imperfect life, it’s so easy to get wrapped up in doubt and lies. It’s so easy to think that you’re foolish for having faith, or weak because you aren’t doing ‘big’ things yet. It’s so easy to listen to people around you and fill your mind with their fear instead of trusting what you know in your heart to be true. It’s so easy to be distracted, thinking that God doesn’t pay attention to what’s going on in your life or that there are a thousand other people He could use for His work.
But when I feel small, I remind myself of this verse:
“Pardon me, my lord,” Gideon replied, “but how can I save Israel? My clan is the weakest in Manasseh, and I am the least in my family.”
— Judges 6:15 (NIV)
In this verse, Gideon prays to God, desperate for an answer. He’s just an ordinary person, just an everyday soul wandering around this earth. And yet, he’s been called to do big things.
God called Gideon to deliver Israel from the Midianites. He could have picked a king, a ruler, a leader. He could have chosen anyone, but He wanted Gideon. And with Gideon—this everyday person—God delivered Israel (Hebrews 11:32).
How powerful is that? How powerful that God reached down and selected this common little human to make an incredible change? How wonderful that this is an example for each of us—that it doesn’t matter who we are, or how miniscule we feel—when it comes to God, we can be used for big things.
The truth is, we were meant for extraordinary. Even though sometimes we feel like we’re just stumbling around, God has put us in situations for a reason. He’s surrounded us with people for a specific purpose. He’s given us both closed and open doors to fulfill His plan.
He may feel unapproachable at times, or a little distant. But in reality, He knows us each by name. He knows the worries and desires on our hearts. He even knows the number of hairs on our heads (Luke 12:7).
At the end of the day, no matter how small we feel, or how little of an impact we think we’re making, God can (and will) use us for big things.
We just need to have faith.
We need to know that He does hear our cries, our worries, our joys. He does listen to our prayers and does long to bring us closer to Him. He does have a greater purpose for us, oftentimes wilder than we’ve ever imagined.
So stop thinking you’re less, simply because you don’t know how to make change, or do something different, or you feel frustrated that nothing’s really happened yet. God works on His timeline and in His own ways.
Let go and let Him move.