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Self-Love

9 Minor Changes To Make For An Empowered, Positive Year

1. Stop seeing everyone else’s success as a scale to measure your own.

There is always going to be someone who is stronger, further along, more prepared, more financially stable, etc. than you. If you’re constantly looking at everyone else, comparing yourself, using their success or wealth or happiness as a measure of your own, you’ll never be satisfied. You’ll forever feel unworthy, less, and empty.

Instead, focus on what you do have, what you’ve gained or how you’ve grown. Make rules and goals for yourself, and propel forward without worrying where you ‘fit.’ At the end of the day, what matters is how you see yourself. This is your journey, not anyone else’s.

2. Stop looking to everyone around you for validation.

Looking outside yourself for acceptance will always leave you feeling lost. Sure, there will be people you admire or want to emulate, but if you measure your self-worth on their opinion of you, you’ll forever be searching for who you really are.

Instead of letting the world tell you who and what you should be, seek the answers within yourself. What do you desire? Hope? Crave? Need? Validate and encourage yourself.

3. Focus on the people who bring positive energy, and return that energy and attention to them in all the ways you can.

Don’t waste time and energy on people who don’t see your worth. If someone isn’t giving you the time and attention you deserve, if they constantly make you feel worried or insecure, if your relationship is filled with more drama than care—walk away.

Foster relationships with people who want to build you, as they build themselves. Develop friendships that challenge and inspire you, with people who long to grab the most they can from this world. Surround yourself with people who love you, and love them wildly in return.

4. Look at what you’ve gained rather than what you’ve lost.

You’ll win and you’ll fail. You’ll hold and you’ll let go. You’ll gain and you’ll lose. These are natural progressions of life. Instead of focusing on what you no longer have, shift your focus to things of beauty, hope, and joy.

You have far more blessings than burdens; choose to see them.

5. Start listening to your inner desires, even if they don’t match the world’s.

One of the most empowering things you can do is shut off the voices in your head that say you can’t, shouldn’t, or won’t. Instead of letting negativity be your vibration, hum to the melody of self-love and confidence.

You have goals, dreams, wishes, and happiness budding within you. Even if these things don’t match what the rest of the world is doing, fill your heart with light and chase them fearlessly.

6. Keep a journal of your thoughts, ideas, and daily happenings.

Self-reflection is invaluable. Taking time to record your emotions, thoughts, feelings, or just moments from the day can help you to take a step back, improve, and seek peace in difficult moments. Journaling can also help you to set goals, release the past, and look forward to what’s coming.

7. Give people eye contact when they speak and demand attention and respect with a confident, yet humble approach.

When speaking with another person, give them your attention. And in return, request that same respect. You are deserving of people who are interested in what you have to say. Communication is a two-sided, beautiful street.

8. Wake up five minutes earlier to mediate, think, breathe, and take time to simply be before rushing into the responsibilities of the day.

Be intentional from the start of every morning. Take a few moments to breathe, reflect, and think with a hopeful mindset for what’s to come. Slowing down refocuses your energy and gives you peace to take with you and bless both yourself, and those around you.

9. Start seeking change, rather than stagnancy.

Change is terrifying, but it’s the only way we can grow. Instead of fearing what’s coming next or resisting anything that is shifting you in a new direction, let go. Allow the universe to pull you to places you never imagined, both good and bad.

Crave difference, movement, and the unknown rather than being still—it is there that you grow. TC mark

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Marisa is a writer, poet, & editor. She is the author of Somewhere On A Highway, a poetry collection on self-discovery, growth, love, loss and the challenges of becoming. Follow Marisa on Instagram or read more articles from Marisa on Thought Catalog.