Love has never had rules with you. There was never a ‘right time’ or ‘right way,’ never a list of guidelines or an instruction manual written in the corners of your mind. You watched those older than you navigate the relationship waters and you smiled at their success. You took in the way two lovers spoke to each other, the gentle way their lips brushed. You absorbed. You listened. You took note of those who tried to caution you—to be careful with your heart, to be hesitant to trust, to stay guarded before allowing someone fully in.
But you never listened.
You were always both feet in, charging forward at full speed. You were never afraid of the ‘what ifs’ or the ‘what could happens.’ You never let the fear of being broken stop you from taking a chance. You saw the good in people, and the hope for love, even in the darkness.
You were always a believer in forces greater than yourself, and love was no exception.
And so you made your own rules. You loved at your own pace. You invited people in with open arms. You took down your walls. You showed them who you were, who you weren’t afraid to be.
You loved fully, because that’s how your heart has been wired since birth.
You gave those you cared for all you had and more, because to you, anything less than everything seemed silly, seemed pointless. You trusted, because you didn’t have a reason not to. You were selfless, because your heart was happy.
You have always been the girl with a heart too big for her body. And it’s time you stop apologizing for that.
You don’t have to be sorry for the girl who loves, who loves to love, who will continue to love, even after she is broken. You don’t have to be sorry for the fact that you will get back up again, dust yourself off, and head back into the dating world.
You don’t have to be sorry for your resilience, for your softness, for your strong heart that will still search for love, even after he’s gone.
You don’t need to apologize for being a lover, a fighter, a fighter for love.
You believe in giving yourself fully. You believe in second chances. You believe in trust and having faith in another person. You believe that love is real and you won’t ever stop searching for it, falling into it, embracing it with open arms.
So stop apologizing for who you are, for who and how you’ve always been. Stop apologizing for the way your heart beats. For the way it gives itself to people, over and over. Stop apologizing for your boldness. For your faith in things unseen.
Because life is too short to love timidly, to be hesitant, to not be true to yourself and the way you feel.
You are a beautiful, big, bleeding heart.
And that’s something to be proud of.