21 Ways You’re Unintentionally Holding Yourself Back From Finding Real Love


1. You keep telling yourself that you’re not good enough.

2. You think that everyone you meet is just like your ex.

3. You’re too terrified of getting hurt to fully let people in.

4. There’s a part of you that’s always guarded, even when you’re in a relationship.

5. You’re convinced that there’s a ‘Mr./Miss Right’ out there and you aren’t willing to accept that imperfection is the reality of being human.

6. You’re hesitant to trust others, so you change the subject when it gets too deep, even though you crave a deeper connection.

7. You let things get in the way of your happiness instead of realizing that life is going to throw crappy things at you, and you’re strong enough to get through them.

8. You compare your relationships to others.

9. You are too quick to see others’ imperfections.

10. You are scared to love too deeply, so you hold back.

11. You have this idea about what love should look like in your head, and it affects how you perceive relationships.

12. Your mind is filled with negativity regarding love.

13. When it comes to putting yourself out there, going on dates, or initiating conversation, you are hesitant.

14. You back away when you feel someone is getting too close.

15. You like to find all the reasons why something/someone won’t work in your life instead of how it/they will.

16. You are in a rush to fall in love.

17. You overthink instead of letting things and emotions happen as they happen.

18. When you find someone you’re really interested in, you don’t give yourself (or the other person) the time to really invest your emotions.

19. You feel like there’s this timeline to finding love and sometimes rush into commitments you aren’t quite ready for.

20. You hold onto people from your past because you’re scared you won’t be able to find someone else.

21. You tell yourself you don’t deserve real love, or that it’s not real. Thought Catalog Logo Mark

Marisa is a writer, poet, & editor. She is the author of Somewhere On A Highway, a poetry collection on self-discovery, growth, love, loss and the challenges of becoming.

Keep up with Marisa on Instagram, Twitter, Amazon and marisadonnelly.com

More From Thought Catalog