50 Comical (But Totally Real) Thoughts You Have When You Feel Like Absolute Crap

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1. I’m not sick, I’m just tired.

2. Okay, I’m totally sick.

3. I need Vitamin C!

4. Ew. Where the heck does all this snot come from?!

5. I wish my mom was here to take care of me.

6. I should ask her for that homemade chicken soup recipe.

7. God, I really need a nap.

8. When can I take a nap?

9. Should I call in sick?

10. I wonder if my boss will be pissed if I call in sick.

11. Ugh, I feel like deathhhhh.

12. Do I look okay?

13. Omg those bags under my eyes are terrible.

14. I don’t want to put on clothes.

15. God, I’m freezing.

16. Can I just wear fuzzy slippers all day?

17. I’m hungry.

18. Ugh, nothing sounds good to eat.

19. Ohmygoddddd what am I going to eat?!

20. Should I go to the doctor?

21. Will anyone notice that I’m wearing the same sweatpants?

22. Ew. My hair looks so greasy.

23. Is that a pimple?!?!

24. I should really take a shower.

25. Damn, this shower feels amazing.

26. Now I’m freezing!!!

27. Wow, these blankets are so warm!

28. Okay, I’m sweating.

29. I’m so hottttttttttt!

30. I don’t want to put on normal clothes.

31. Should I take medicine?

32. What helps with body aches?

33. Do I have a fever?

34. I need more Kleenex.

35. I’ve used three boxes of Kleenex already?!

36. I wonder if there’s anything good on TV.

37. What show should I watch on Netflix?!

38. I’m so tired.

39. I wonder if I smell like a sick person.

40. What do sick people smell like?

41. I wish I could breathe out of my nose.

42. Am I an annoying nose-blower?

43. Do I look stupid when I blow my nose?

44. OMG do I have a booger hanging from my nose?!?!

45. I should probably go to bed early tonight.

46. I still don’t know what to eat.

47. How long will this sickness last?

48. I should probably go to the doctor.

49. Do I look ugly when I cough?

50. Ew. I’m totally not cute right now.