How To No Longer Get Hurt In All Aspects Of Your Life

credit: Marisa DeMarco
credit: Marisa DeMarco

We’re human. Each of us are uniquely special for who and what we are, which celebrates our differences. But again, we’re human…which means that if we strip away both our physical appearance, personality, and identity we all are hardwired with a basic yet profound set of needs both biologically and emotionally. These needs transcend gender, culture, religion, upbringing, family structure, and values. Within varying degrees, we require the need to feel and be loved, connected, and safe. As long as we’re living and breathing, we require nutrients, sleep, and shelter. We also feel and express emotions—through the beauty and pain of life itself. Uncertainty is the very crux of being human, but if we can take a step back and actually reflect on what that means, it’s actually the card to our personal freedom. With a healthy balance of logic and intuition, we can navigate our lives with ease instead of anxiety and fear which are the root of the unknown.

Living in the unknown rather than the present is what causes the human spirit more harm than good. This is not to say we mustn’t prepare ourselves for smart future planning—goals, finances, relationships, family structure, studies, and careers. But it means that within the frame work of the lives we’re living and we’re creating for a later date, things shift and change as nothing remains permanent. What we think and believe today can be quite different from tomorrow—which can alter the course of the original idea and or plan we had in mind. Needless to say, external factors also have a role too in how we shape the lives we are living and aspire to live.

With uncertainty may bring feelings of second-guessing, doubt, and insecurity. We are afraid to make mistakes, repeat past errors, and compare previous life situations and people within the present reality—which may or may not even apply to what or who it is that is in front of us. Many times we hold on to past pain and various events or individuals that have done us wrong as perhaps we have done to others. In fact, some of us grow so accustomed to living a life of unhappiness connected to past events that it’s all that we know and in turn it feels “safe” even though it’s what’s holding us back. We are all beautifully flawed, but we are also truly beautiful in our own right. We can shift the focus to face our flaws and insecurities as we accept who it is we are in the “here and now”. Yet we can choose to continue our evolution and personal growth to become the best and improved versions of ourselves, which is balance, self-care and self worth. We become stronger, more whole, healed, and we can reach the point of being secure within our minds, bodies, and spirits. This allows us to evenly temper all that enters on our life’s journey. The only way to avoid getting hurt is not giving our power away to others and events that can cause us harm or pain. It’s all about perception and what we choose to accept or not. We can only choose to open up and share ourselves authentically (with of course healthy boundaries and limits of self-protection), with the internal knowledge that it is very possible and probable that others may not feel or think favorably of us. But at the very least we are not hiding behind a mask of insecurity, but showing up with a face of sincerity. Whatever happens next is unknown, but it doesn’t matter because the more grounded and solid we are in ourselves, we can handle whatever and whomever comes our way. Nothing and no one is taken deeply personal which means there is truly no harm or foul on the horizon. TC mark

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