After spending the majority of my life with preoccupations, projecting, and planning ahead based upon how I thought things should go, I’ve faced my share of let downs and delusions based upon expectation. There have been those who’ve had an impact of varying degrees—some of which that shine a light so bright on these wounds. But ultimately, it’s taking responsibility for my actions and accepting that I created many of these obstacles. Hence, I’m now coconsciously making the choice to reflect, heal, and move forward.
There is great importance into following dreams, taking risks, creating short term and long-term goals, along realizing what and who is important while growing into one’s own over time. However, if we are able to become more self-disciplined in the re-programming of our minds, we can see and feel its positive effects. We can fully remain in the present rather than jumping so far ahead that we can’t even keep up with ourselves in the “future”… a future that doesn’t even exist yet.
1. By letting people and situations grow on their own timeframe, it eliminates pressure placed upon them and ourselves for what they “should be or become” to fit our vision.
Wanting someone or something to change so bad, in turn can push it away. Learning to allow personal growth and the growth of others to happen naturally will give more authentic, whole, and well earned results.
2. Enjoy your loved ones now and maximize the exchange of love, conversation, time, and affection spent together.
From afar the world has become smaller through technology and in person, a hug can warm the soul. Whatever the proximity is, it’s important to respect and reciprocate undivided attention in the presence of others. We all have something to say and share that’s worth listening to.
3. It takes a loss of a loved one to realize the blessings that once were and how to appreciate what is.
After spending much time around illness and death of family members and loved ones, it gives a new perspective of living each day as a gift. Some days are more pleasant to receive than others, but nonetheless, they have a place in time/space in which we exist. Before my aunt’s passing she said she was “living minute to minute” as that’s the best she could do. In fact, this is the best that any of us can do.
4. Be where your feet are and allow them to rest awhile in whatever place they’ve stumbled upon.
My mom often reminds me of this little, but powerful wisdom. We can truly acknowledge where are feet are: at work, at home, out to dinner, in the car, and on vacation. It’s a gentle thought to anchor us to the present place or activity we’re engaged in before moving on to the next.
5. Indulging in your favorite guilty pleasure and blocking out the world around you is the true nourishment of the soul.
Whatever your guilty pleasure is whether it be a TV show, website, food, drink, place, activity, or even a person, allow sufficient time to enjoy each and every moment. Engage in your guilty pleasure until you feel satisfied.
6. Looking into the eyes of your beloved in complete silence suspends the existence of time and space.
When in the presence of a partner or someone so dear, let the experience transcend all limits of the outer world and create a sacred space in which the both of you occupy. Not only will it deepen your connection, but it reveals a language that is only spoken together in that very moment.
7. Finding refuge in nature, at home, or a favorite space allows for personal repair and rejuvenation in silence.
By finding a few minutes daily of “the here and now” to detach from the demands of life, a sense of tranquility can be obtained through a simple escape. Allowing for decompression creates a reset and relaxing opportunity for the mind and body after hard work and thought.
8. Sunday brunch followed by a walk with loved ones makes way for delicious food, varied conversation, and the pleasure of fresh air (in company) after eating a hearty meal of the day.
Any excuse to spend an afternoon around the table with the shared bond of eating and talking with people that care for us as we care for them is one of life’s simple pleasures. Discard preoccupations of what is to come, and enjoy the sweetness of what is in front of us instead.
9. Giving up control along with choosing the path of least resistance actually allows for more trust and ease in oneself, the process of life, and the workings of the universe.
If we continue to pretend that we know what’s best for us while wearing a mask of false bravado or self doubt, we will continue to remain in situations that are less than pleasing without finding a way out. Once we surrender this belief, the present actually becomes more gentle, enjoyable, and clearly reveals the next natural steps.
10. Live like an Italian…”la dolce far niente” (the beauty of doing nothing).
This sentiment is beautifully embedded within Italian life and culture over centuries. Perhaps this explains why Italy is still one of the highest ranked countries for its citizens’ well-being despite economic crisis. Simply stated, enjoy the present without the preoccupations of tomorrow and literally…take a moment and do nothing but just be.