For The Boy I Love

Dear Boy That I Love,

I love you. No, I am not ‘in love with you.’ I just love you. I know that you’ll never accept this, but you are worth loving. You are worth caring, Boy.

I love you. I get that you’d rather do acid and become “one with the whales” than be loved by the girl who loves too hard. But I’m going to love you anyway, Boy.

I love you. I know that I tell you that “I hate you” every day, but that’s my way of telling you I care. It’s confusing, I know, but I am a hard thing to understand, Boy.

I love you. I love you more than I thought I loved that abusive boy that you helped me get over so so quickly. I love you more than I love Loft-house Sugar Cookies, Boy.

I love you. I love the way that your mouth turns upward when you’re talking about your mom. I love the way you are the only person that I don’t lie to constantly. I love you, Boy.

I love you. I love the way you show your intelligence in the small moments of life. I love that I can count on you to beat up anyone who gets in my way, Boy.

I love you. I don’t expect love back; I just want you to be okay. Not even happy, just okay. I want you to be sane enough that I only spend an hour dwelling on your wellbeing, Boy.

I love you. I know that you’ll never believe me; I know that I’ll never tell you, but you make life have a purpose. You give me something to care about, Boy.

I love you and there is nothing that you can do about it.

Boy.

Best,

Love