What They Dont Tell You About Forgiveness

woman standing on sunflower garden
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They tell you to forgive the people that have hurt you. They tell that those people are suffering and that’s why they hurt other people. They tell you that holding on to your anger does not serve you justice because those people are already paying for what they’ve inflicted onto you; they are suffering.

They tell you that you need to forgive them to free yourself from your own suffering. They tell you that you don’t need to hold on to the pain, don’t let yourself suffer too. Those people are already suffering because of the way they are, and holding on to your anger will not bring you justice, it will not bring you peace. They tell you to forgive, move on, and let life serve everyone what they best deserve.

They tell you to forgive like forgiving is as easy as taking your next breath.

They tell you to forgive, but they don’t realize that sometimes the people that hurt you are not suffering. They tell you to forgive but they don’t realize that some people will never comprehend the pain they’ve inflicted onto others; they will never hold themselves accountable for the repercussions of their actions.

They tell you to forgive and they simplify forgiveness and boil it down to justice being served regardless of your forgiveness, so why hold on to pain? They think forgiveness is simply letting things be because eventually everything will be fair.

They don’t realize that forgiveness is sometimes the swallowing of the unfairness.

Sometimes the people that have hurt you could go about their lives and have everything be perfectly peachy. Sometimes they will not even feel a fraction of what they’ve caused. They will not feel remorse; they will continue to live their lives as if you were a blimp in theirs.

And that’s not fair, but sometimes, that is all there is to it.

And the thing they don’t tell you about forgiveness is that whether or not the people that hurt you are suffering should not be factored into your healing.

They base your forgiveness on their pain and the unraveling of your justice and that’s what makes forgiveness even harder when all that, is not the case.

Forgiveness is acceptance; the acceptance of life as it bluntly is, the acceptance of the unbalance, the acceptance of the fact that only in fiction do stories always end with poetic justice, the acceptance of the fact that people can be toxic and not know it.

People can hurt other people, and not get hurt back.

Forgiveness is the acceptance of the fact that some people can be toxic and also be fully aware of it and not give two fucks about the echoes of their actions. Maybe that’s the case because the echo hasn’t hit a wall yet and maybe the echo will never hit a wall and will instead go through other people; people like you.

But how you receive that echo; whether you make a wall of yourself or a body of water, is what forgiveness really is. TC mark

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