The 6 People Who Change Us

The people that change us, whether for better or for worse, play an important role in our lives. They cross our paths and change our whole direction. Sometimes, they stay for a lifetime. Other times, they leave. And every now and then, if they have a new purpose in our lives to be fulfilled, they come back.

Whether they stay or go, one thing is for sure — they come into our lives and we are never the same. The best professor I’ve ever had in college once said, “When the tide goes up, everything changes.”

Here are the 6 people that change us:

1. The first love

First loves are unforgettable because not only they are our first, but also because they change us so much in so little time.

They change us because they are the ones who get us to do things we thought we would never do. They introduce us to our “firsts,” from new experiences to new emotions we never knew existed.

They are the ones whom we would do almost anything for. We break rules for more adventures with them. Disobey our parents to stay with them. Defend our relationship when others criticize it. And even make sacrifices to make them happy.

Our first love changes us, because for the first time in our life, we let somebody else see parts of us, which we have never revealed to anyone else before. They change us by making us more vulnerable. We share secrets with them and they know our deepest thoughts. They become our best friend. They make us realize the definition of intimacy.

Then, they leave us, or we leave them. And we find ourselves stuck in the bed with our hearts literally aching. Whatever the reason of the break up is, we would undergo a self-transformation just to get our lives back together or to get over the fact that they are not our last.  We’d even travel or live in another country just to get over them.

First loves change us so much that some people are unable to love so deeply again.

2. The ones that break our hearts

With great pain comes great transformation. The ones who break our hearts are the people we care about the most. They are our first loves, the love of our life and sometimes, our closest friends. They could be are our family members too.

Whoever they are and whatever they did to cause us so much pain, one thing is for sure, they make us realize many things.

They make us realize what is important to us. They make us realize that friendships do not always last. They make us realize that we can overcome any struggle in the world as long as we are alive. And that the ones we care about the most are the ones who end up hurting us the deepest.

3. The ones who help us get out of our comfort zone

These are the people who get us to do things we are too afraid or “too cool” to try. They are the ones who get us to do the activities we cannot do with other people. They are the adventurous and the crazy ones. We always have fun with them wherever we are.

They change us by making us realize that it is okay to be occasionally silly. And that it is better to be silly than boring.

They change us by bringing new experiences into our lives with their “I-don’t-care-about-what-people-think” attitude and sense of adventure. Our lives are more interesting because of them.

4. The ones we look up to

The ones we look up to are our role models. They have traits or skills that we want to have. They could be our professor, our boss, our parents or our successful friend.

Their advice can change our whole direction. And sometimes, they help us get the opportunities we need to succeed.

Whoever they are, the people we look up to change us because we try to be like them or because we put their advice into practice.

5. The people we marry

When our marital status changes from single to married, our life changes and so do we. There are certain things we used to do that we can no longer do, such as overly spending on material things.

And just like first love, we experience many “firsts” with the person we marry, from having the first child to building a family for the first time. The people we marry teach us the importance of compromise and sacrifice to make a relationship work.

The person we marry can change us for better or for worse. It all depends on how the marriage goes.

The people we marry may not be our first love. However, if we are lucky enough, they could be the love of our life.

6. Our first child

Our first child changes us, because having one for the first time makes us change our ways and our perspective on life. Our late night outs turn to late night feedings and late night diaper changes. Our priority changes too. If our priority was our self, it is now the baby.

We become more responsible and take fewer risks, because we think about how our actions and decisions can affect the child.

Our first child teaches us about the importance of life and unconditional love.