There comes a point in life where we desperately want what we can’t have. It is truly one of the most difficult things someone can go through. Our hearts are set on the one thing we want the most. In reality, the one thing that we want the most may not actually be what is best or meant for us.
Liking someone who is already in a relationship is truly a struggle. You almost feel like you are strapped but cannot reach out because that person’s heart is already taken. You know you want this person but cannot have them. This person was not yours to begin with.
The situation came about on its own—you just happened to like this person. In the beginning, when you first met them, you couldn’t wait to get to know more about them. As time passed, you eventually found out eventually their heart was already taken by someone else. Someone beat you to it and took that place you wanted so badly for yourself.
How does one handle this type of situation? This isn’t how you wanted things to be. Liking someone who is already taken makes you feel so many emotions you can’t even explain. Even though you and this person are friends, it hurts like hell that you aren’t the person they are with. The more time you spend with someone who is already taken, the more you want them for yourself. You immediately find yourself picturing all the possibilities of you and your crush together. Your heart aches for this person because you want them so badly for yourself.
In our minds, we have a perfect vision of ending up with the person we desperately want. Those are just fantasies, not the reality of the situation. The truth of the matter is that what’s meant to be will always be. What’s meant to be ours will always be ours.
How do we let go of someone we want but cannot have? As human beings, we cannot unlike someone we already like romantically. Life doesn’t work that way. As hard as it is, we have to feel that pain of not getting what we want. With pain comes wisdom. With wisdom comes strength.
It is absolutely okay to keep that person you like as a friend. You want to have that person in your life because they mean so much to you. You try to convince yourself that eventually this person will break up with their significant other for you. You don’t want the other person they are with to get hurt, but you want this person all for yourself. You feel wrong for even thinking this way. This isn’t you at all.
Once again, our fantasies are playing games with our minds, trying to convince us otherwise. You hold out hope that things will be different in the future. You picture yourself finally being able to get a chance to be with the person you like so much.
But what if it’s not meant to be? Our hearts are muscles and should be protected at all times. We need to guard our hearts and really think of certain things that are meant for us. As humans, our hearts want one thing. Our minds are telling us otherwise. Sometimes what our hearts want isn’t what is meant for us.
This doesn’t mean something better will come along. Liking someone who is already taken is toxic for both our minds and our hearts. Some things we just have to let go and let it be. Accepting the reality of it all is the hardest part.
Protecting our hearts is the most important of all things. The book of proverbs 4 verse 23 states “above all else, guard your heart, for everything flows from it.” Guarding our hearts as humans sometimes requires us to let go of what we cannot have. You don’t want to be selfish because you want this person all for yourself. You need to love and respect yourself more than that. You would be disrespecting yourself continuing to put yourself in this situation.
You deserve so much better. You deserve an available heart. You deserve someone who can give you what you truly need. A taken heart won’t be able to give you what you need. A taken heart is taken for a reason. Accepting the situation for what it really is will help us have a peaceful mind. Most importantly it will help us to move forward.