Davey Wavey, the cute as fuck YouTube star who makes videos about gay life, recently posted a thing called “Gay Guys React To Racist Grindr Profiles!” that is an important perspective about this issue that all gay man should see. In the clip gays (including the fabulous Todrick Hall who did this Beyoncé flash mob at a Target!) read the text of real, actual Grindr profiles and react to the racist stuff that’s said.
Here are some poignant highlights:
“Vanilla or spice, no chocolate or rice.”
“And Asians, prease reave me arone.”
“Is there a block all black button?”
“I’m white and attractive so sorry but if you are anything less (i.e. not white) you’re not worth it. Just a preference sorry.”
Mind you these are real, actual things real humans have typed out loud about other people. If you can’t see the racism embedded in these phrases…
I have never heard a single argument in favor of race-based sexual exclusions I can get behind. “It’s just a preference” doesn’t even begin to cut it because preferences are always shaped by our surroundings, by culture and they are distilled to us every single day of our lives through television, film and other media. And most popular media is lily white. Don’t even get me started on that whole “I don’t like Asians just like I’m not attracted to women” line, the most basic argument I have ever heard because now you’re saying being gay is a matter of choice.
The problem when brown gay men speak on sexual racism is that, in general, we are told by the white gay establishment that our experiences are invalid, that we are just angry and should let people have their preferences and live their lives. They should and they will. They have the luxury of saying that, though, because without fail and in nearly every country in the West a white gay male is unlikely to open up an app or go on a dating website and see anti-white profiles. He will open up a gay magazine, go to a gay website, see a gay movie or television show and there he will be. Always.
That’s why I think this Davey Wavey video is so cool. I wonder if white gay men might listen more closely now that one of them has pointed out how ridiculous and harmful sexual racism is.
Loving each other should not be a matter of “preference.”