More than nine million people have seen a video of what happens when two guys hold hands in Russia. If you haven’t seen it, watch it now but be warned: it’s not cute. The boys get called names and, in the worse case scenario, they’re physically assaulted, a reality for gay men and women everywhere. Though the video is incredibly alarming it’s not necessarily that surprising given Russia’s steeply homophobic climate.
But, child, you know what they say about homophobes: they WISH they were as free are we are to publicly enjoy Kylie and put on a pair of sickening assless chaps, if that’s what you’re into.
I’m sick of all the anti-gay rhetoric. Being gay is amazing and don’t let anyone tell you any differently.
1. Wearing your boyfriend’s shirt has a whole new meaning. Literally. When you’re gay you get to double your wardrobe, especially if you’re seeing someone who has a similar body type to you! Maybe you don’t have the same style or sense of fashion. I couldn’t never date someone who dressed just like me, but damnit if you need an extra pair of underwear after sleeping over one night you’re set. Wearing each other’s clothes is cute!
2. When you’re at university all your friends will be toiling away in classes they don’t actually want to be in while you get to take courses in queer studies and gay and lesbian history! Learn about cruising culture, HIV/AIDS, read gay literature, and most of all learn that you’re not alone but part of a broader lineage of queer folk.
3. Gay people get to be in new kinds of relationships because the end goal of for us is not necessarily marriage — though it’s possible now! — and not necessarily to have children. We do relationships for the love, the companionship and the commitment, not because society pressures us into one.
4. Have you had gay sex before? It’s like, if you have sex with someone who has the same parts as you CHANCES ARE THEY KNOW WHAT THEY’RE DOING TO YOU LOL (although definitely not always smdh).
5. Gay people get to be more fluid in our gender presentation, and that’s really exciting. We get to play with, alter and revise restrictive gender norms. Girl, you better get into me in this blue polkadot blouse!!! Who says men can’t wear blouses? Who says women must dress this way and men that way? Some gays have a better understanding of gender as a fiction, as a farce, which opens you up to experiment and embrace your masculine and feminine sides.
6. Enjoy the fact that gays have left a permanent stamp in the arts, everywhere from dance music and performance art to fashion and literature. A lot of this work is produced from the experience of playing with gender or expressing something unique about sexuality.
At the end of the day, being gay means you get to be yourself. So many gay people I know talk about how they were “before” they were gay and who they are “after” they realized they were gay. And I’m telling you, no one remembers who they were or wants to go back to what they were like “before.”