24 Things That Feel Better Than Orgasms


1) When an ex gets ugly on Facebook. Nothing tastes as awesome as revenge feels.

2) Flipping over to the cold side of the pillow, no matter the season.

3) The words: “Your test came back negative.”

4) Showering and the karaoke version of “Crazy in Love” and singing to it in the shower like you are performing in front of millions.

5) When you have a headache, take a nap, wake up and POOF it’s gone.

6) When a friend tells you about a new show you haven’t heard of and you power through every episode of it.

7) Drinking a glass of your favorite wine. Or a bottle — same thing.

8) Drinking ice cold water on a hot summer day. But is there anybody out there who enjoys lukewarm, pee-temperature water tho?

9) The moment you finally feel confident in the foreign language you’re learning. You can communicate without feeling too shy or like you’re embarrassing yourself every time you open your mouth.

10) Having your hair played with by someone you like a whole lot, before you’ve had sex.

11) Cleaning your ears with a Q-Tip.

12) Tackling your biggest fear and realizing that there was really nothing to be afraid of.

13) Waking up next to the person you love.

14) A fresh pair of socks — from right out of the package. Never again will they feel so soft and springy.

15) When its mid-day and your phone still has 70% battery left.

16) Dipping your hands in a bowl of rice.

17) The words: “I’m not pregnant.”

18) The correct ratio of condiments/fixins to sandwich. Nobody wants just bread and lettuce, sandwich making people.

19) Getting your tax refund deposited or any other big ass check. Getting paid earlier than you thought.

20) Doing something you were reluctant to do and actually having an amazing time.

21) That first bite of a Chick-Fil-A chicken nugget when you haven’t had one in a long time.

22) Getting dressed up for graduation and realizing that you did it.

23) Paying off a huge debt. Now the bill collectors will stop calling and you can finally stop ignoring your phone or saying that they have “the wrong number.”

24) Googling your symptoms and realizing you’re NOT dying. Thought Catalog Logo Mark

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