The Pros And Cons Of Shopping Online

Pros

• ASOS
• If you’re too lazy to drive all the way to the mall/local Big Lots, all you have to do is bust out that computer or cut on that iPad/iPhone et voila! You now have the entirety of the consumer marketplace at your finger tips. On any device.
• You no longer have to worry about circling the mall 12 times and fighting through angry people who are sick of their relatives being in town to get the spot closest to the entrance.
• When you shop online you can impulsively put a bunch of stuff in your shopping cart, then delete some of it when you realize that, yikes, there’s A LOT of stuff in there, maybe you should tone it down.
• There are no lines, so less of a chance you’ll end up in the hospital instead of at the cash wrap.
• No one can see the real, human you as you sit on the couch clipping your toe nails and stuffing your face with Doritos and Cool Whip while you dutifully sift through 44 pages of NEW ARRIVALS!!
• You come home from school/work/a trip and there’s a happy little package at the door waiting for you. Even if you already know what’s in it, it still feels like a mini celebration.
• Stores are open 24/7, minus network outages/site upgrades.
• There are no babies/loose children to toss to the side as you rush to see what’s left in the $10 bin.
• There is no better feeling than winning a bid on eBay or of getting the last of something before it sells out.
• Sometimes things are actually cheaper online than they are in the physical store.
• You can literally buy anything, which is as exciting as it is scary.
• You can shop to occupy yourself when you are plunged in exceedingly boring situations that are difficult to escape, like class, work, or family dinners.
• It’s much easier to send people gifts—you don’t even have to go to the Post Office, and we all know what a swift, cheerful place that can be during the holiday season.
• If you’re too embarrassed to buy things like dildos, lube or Magnum condoms out in society, just get them online. Privacy! The unmarked black box it comes in will be much less suspicious.

Cons

• It is no longer possible to flirt with the cute cashier in the reindeer ears.
• The models always look better in the clothes than you will, because models are not real humans.
• If you don’t buy that thing RIGHT WHEN YOU SEE IT, it’s going to sell out. Either that or Large will be the only one left. Nobody wants Large.
• Sometimes it takes FOREVER for your stuff to arrive, even though you picked expedited shipping from the drop down menu and it was like a billion dollars extra.
• What if the package never comes? What if somebody steals it?
• Impulse shopping. When you shop online you’re not spending real, actual money — no no no. You’re just clicking a button — it’s not the same thing.
• Dutifully scrolling through pages and pages of NEW ARRIVALS!!
• Sometimes, if you’re shopping in the wee hours of the morning, you sign up for a free trial of something you’ll forget to cancel. 
• You seriously weigh whether it would be OK to just skip out on your student loan payment this month and go IN on those Louboutins — they’re on SALE, omg.
• Somebody could be watching your computer and stealing your info. Identity theft is scary and lots of people do it. I should know — it happened to me. But am I shopping online any less than I did before? No I am not.
• You can’t try anything on, and more importantly you can’t try on something ridiculous and immediately upload a photo to Facebook of you working the look.
• Even if it’s not exactly what you thought it was, sometimes you’ll be so lazy to repackage it, relabel it, and take it back to the Post Office that you’ll just be like whatever and keep it anyway.
• The ritual of shopping is gone — the exhilarating feeling you’ve accomplished something and then going home to see your new treasures.
• If you return an item sometimes you have to pay ridic restocking/return fees.
• ASOS.

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