A Guide To Imaginary Relationships

Are you tired of real dating? Do you sometimes wish your significant other didn’t have any feelings at all? Do you feel the need to be in some sort of romantic relationship, but miss the days when your life wasn’t so complicated? Well now, with imaginary relationships, you really can have your cake and eat it too! The decision to start an imaginary relationship can be quite daunting, but the rewards are well worth it – if a bit, er…imaginary. Here are a few simple steps to get you started.

Step 1: Pick a Target

The ideal target is someone you’ve never really interacted with before, but whom you see on a semi-regular basis. You want to know – or be able to guess – enough about them to give them a basic shape in your imagination, but not so much that you won’t be able to mold them to your preferences at all. For best results, your target should have physical characteristics that you find attractive.

Warning: We strongly recommend not picking someone you know very well, even if you know someone with romantic feelings towards you. The possibility of an imaginary relationship becoming real often ruins the experience, particularly when the real-life target drastically differs from the imaginary version. For more on disastrous consequences, see step 4.

Step 2: Start Imagining

While the beginning of the imaginary relationship varies from person to person, most like to start – logically enough – at the beginning. Imagine the circumstances that would bring you and your significant other together. Feel free to utilize familiar environments, people, or objects to make the imaginary meeting more realistic; the more realistic it is, the more satisfying.

Helpful Hint: Remember that your imaginary significant other is yours to mold as you like; you can give or take away personality traits freely, according to your preferences. Disregard implausibility and banish the phrase “too good to be true” from your mind.

Step 3: Let Your Imagination Run Wild!

Once the initial connection is pictured, imaginations tend to run off on their own! Soon, you’ll be imagining your first date, your first kiss – all the way to your wedding day (if that’s what you want). The nature, intensity, and length of your relationship are yours to decide.

Step 4: Avoid Target in Real Life

The most important step in imaginary relationships is being careful not to mix up what’s imaginary and what’s real. It’s imperative to remember that your real target has not imagined the same wonderful moments you have and does not know you as well as you know imaginary him – or even at all. Try to maintain a safe distance from your target in real life and, for the love of God, do not attempt to start a relationship with your target under the impression that he or she will be exactly the same as you imagined. This does not work and always ends in disappointment, due to the fact that the person you have imagined is, shockingly enough, not real – no matter how real your feelings for him or her may have felt inside your deranged mind.

Warning: Imaginary Relationship Inc. cannot be held responsible for the consequences of any imaginary relationships customers may choose to participate in and will not fund the rehabilitation of any such consequences, including – but not limited to – severe schizophrenia, hysteria, alcohol and substance abuse, and depression. TC mark

image – Howie Le


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  • http://twitter.com/alinatrifan Alina Trifan

    I am so having an imaginary relationship. We’re very happy together and it’s been awhile now…So, way to go! Try it now!

  • http://twitter.com/alinatrifan Alina Trifan

    I am so having an imaginary relationship. We’re very happy together and it’s been awhile now…So, way to go! Try it now!

  • Devnull

    It does work, like a charm. Like an imaginary, perfect, eternal charm.

  • Megan Do

    My imaginary girlfriend and I are so happy! Today she asked me to move in with her! Life is grand!

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  • jules

    I used to do this all the time in junior high. It became so much of a problem that I had to control my thinking and pick and choose times when it was “acceptable” to think about my imaginary relationship. 
    It was unfortunate. 

  • Sara

    so much lovely. my imaginary relationships are always tumultuous love stories that span years and never really end.  which is a problem because atm i’m slurrying it up in my head with several lead singers, comedians, and actors.

    mmm ed macfarlane, swing those hips bb

    • Sara

      love* lol #typoshame

  • http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=1712117106 Jocelyn 'Cherry Bomb' Duncan

    Me and the Steven Tyler that exists in my mind are so happy together (Eat ya heart out Erin Brady)

  • http://www.twitter.com/mexifrida Frida

    It’s no fun to try to stop these beautiful scenes from forming in my head!  I’ll just let them go on a little longer…

  • http://pulse.yahoo.com/_P2JRPHYN475ZERP43DI6WW7U3I Anonymous

    i love this. i feel like this is something we can all relate to. i have several imaginary relationships. but the number one imaginary man in my heart is james franco. we have been together for a while now and we are so happy :)

  • Anonymous

    I started doing this when I was about 10 or 11 I think, now I’m much older but I still do this. I’ve had 1 sole and particular one for the past 4 years. I even dream about this person on a regular basis, and in those dreams we are never strangers but perfectly familiar. I long for a real life relationship and affection but I can never seem to get it, so I keep returning to what I have in my imagination, which is fortunately pretty elaborate. I KNOW there’s something not quite right about what I’m doing but how else do I satisy this emotional need, if I never meet someone for whom I feel a mutual attraction?

  • http://setoshino.wordpress.com Setoshino

    Reblogged this on The World Without Us.

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