You Are The Outcome

By


You wake up in the morning and scratch the sheet underneath you, reaching with one hand to your alarm with barely enough strength to press the snooze button. “Why is this happening to me,” you think as you imagine your job or obligations in the form of the purple dragon from Sleeping Beauty torching your comfort and well being in life. You pull yourself out of bed and think about all of the reasons why you shouldn’t have to do anything today. It’s not your fault that you stayed up too late last night.

You are the problem.

Driving on the freeway is the most intoxicatingly frustrating thing you consistently do. Every human sitting in their padded chair, pressing their right foot to the accelerator is a little less intelligent than you. They’re a little less attentive than you. They’re driving slower than you, faster than you, or in the same lane as you. They are incredibly imbecilic in any action they take on this road you’re sharing. “Nobody knows how to drive,” you think, as you press your foot to the gas and cut one of them off to teach them a lesson.

You are the problem.

Talking to your mother is annoying. She’s always nagging you to be better, be like your sister, be like all of your friends who got married and got fat, be like your cousin who clearly starves herself and might whither away in the wind one of these days. Why does she want to know so much about your life? Why does it matter if you checked the mail today? Everyone checks the mail occasionally and it’s not an extremely pressing issue, doesn’t your Mother know you have a new tv series to watch? Yes, yes, you heard about the drama that happened with your second cousin’s gay Dad and your Grandpa and the Ruby ring he stole during the family dinner while your cousin James smoked pot in the bathroom. Okay, now you’re accusing me of using the drug “Mary” and I have to correct you and tell you it’s “Molly” and now you’re convinced I’m doing it. “Why can’t she leave me alone,” you think.

You are the problem.

Why does your Boss always insist that you aren’t working hard enough? He is such a flaming tyrant just dragging the ship of morale down to hang out with Moby Dick.

You are the problem.

Your friend seems down, his words are slow and his sighs are long as he works silently at his computer. You see him walking to get a drink of water and ask him how is day is going. He tells you that he’s been feeling down lately, and that his Mother died recently. His younger brother totaled his car, he lost his job, and he can barely get up in the morning because he has nothing to do. You give him a hug. You say what you can to provide him with sympathy and empathy even though you complain about the privileges in your life that he no longer has. As you pull up to the grocery store you see his favorite drink and buy him a 12 pack and a bag of cookies. You stop by his place on the way back home and hand them to him.
When he asks why, you say, “Because you are special.”

You are the solution.

You go home in time to get the 7 hours of rest you need. You wake up feeling refreshed and gaze out the window to see the depth of the clouds that a camera can’t capture. This day ahead of you holds unknown opportunity. Your alarm song sounded sweeter this morning, almost like a lullaby that woke you into this dream you call life. You brush your teeth and check your phone.
“Today is going to be a wonderful day,” you think.

You are the solution.

Why would you need to rush to work when you can enjoy the new music you downloaded? It reminds you of your old relationship, drinking salted caramel hot chocolate on the couch while watching friends and making fun of each other. That was a great relationship, and it taught you that communication is the foundation of relationships. You forget that you’re driving, and laugh when someone cuts you off in traffic. “They must be in a hurry to get somewhere,” you think.

You are the solution.

A Mother can show a deeper love for her children than the depth of the ocean in its entirety. She wants to know about your life, and she wants to help you with it. She’s lonely because your Dad died a few years ago and all of the children are out of the house. She wants to talk to you about anything, to relate to you in any way. Your health means everything to her, and seeing you happy helps her sleep better than the Ambien she’s been prescribed. “I love you, Mom,” you say.

You are the solution.

With unemployment rising, and your friends failing to find jobs even after they receive their college degrees, you realize how important your job is. You are lucky to have the opportunity to grow with a company, and show your worth to your superiors. They notice how hard you work. They notice your positive attitude.

You are the solution.

Your friend was feeling down for a long while and didn’t tell anyone. He was selling his things, and saying goodbye in a morbid tone for a week leading up to that day you saw him in the kitchen. He had been planning to end his life because he felt as though he had nothing left to live for. You told him he was special, and made him realize that he had the opportunity to live for himself.

You are the solution.