So, about two weeks ago I was in the middle of an argument with this person. Not even an argument, let’s just say an intense conversation. And the person told me that I changed.
In this mist of discussion, I completely just zoned out for a few minutes. I just stared off into space reflecting my life.
Yeah I changed. I’ve become a better person. A person who takes care of herself. Who looks out for herself. Who prioritizes herself.
And I’m happy.
I look back at my life a year ago.
And for the longest time, I had trouble letting go of who I use to be. The old me. It was like there was a ghost haunting me. A ghost lingering above my shoulders holding me back from a beautiful life.
I just felt lost to say the very least. Confused and sad and lost. And don’t get me wrong I still feel that way sometimes. But, these emotions don’t weigh me down like they use to.
One day. My eyes were opened to a new world. A new and amazing world. I stopped finding happiness in pleasing others. I stopped putting the needs of others before mine.
If I’m being honest. I don’t really know where I am going with this whole article. But I really want to make one thing clear:
It’s okay to be selfish.
Fight for what you want.
I think that’s what just really weighed me down my whole life. I wanted everyone around me to be happy. I didn’t care if I was happy. I found happiness through others. It took me years to come to this realization.
But one day I looked in the mirror and had one of those weird “fuck it” epiphany. One of those weird moments when you’re just like “Shit, how didn’t I see this sooner.”
For a couple seconds you kind of hate yourself. You think of what your life could of been like for so long if you had just opened your eyes sooner. I was mad at myself for the longest time. But, I realized that I couldn’t change the past. I could only move on.
Candace Bushnell said, “You have to let go of who you were to become who you will be.”
Don’t let the old version of yourself dictate who you become. Let go of the old you.
The new you is waiting.