Advertising… the thinking man’s “shouting at people on the street”. Ever since businesses discovered that ads with provocative, over the top images lead to increased sales, they’ve been furiously pandering eye candy to the public, asking us to get in their van of consumerism. And while it may seem fun and silly as you stroll down the street, your sight glued to adverts like macaroni to a third grader’s art project, know that it’s effecting your brain in ways you never imagined.
Though Coca Cola has made an empire off of a drink that is said to bring happiness, I have slurped many of their soda, and still I find myself experiencing emotional entropy on a daily basis. Cans, bottles, none of it stops the slow advancing of my numbness, my mind becoming a glacier of apathy. One that no animated Coca Cola polar bears can save me from.
Perfume companies will often promote their products with stimulating images of under dressed women, but what they don’t know is now I cannot be intimate with a woman without assuming she is only here to sell me fragrances. Many a nights have ended in awkward sputters, as I once again feel the sting of rejection, fully convinced that this raven-haired angel is but another salesman of smells, using my weakness for profit. Through confusion my suitor will argue that they’re simply taking off their clothes, as is normal, by the time I am able to accept such tales her hormones have ceased their longing, and I am alone once more.
Beef Jerky is a product that is made to portray a tire pump of masculinity, expanding your testosterone with every long chew. However, though I have now upped my jerky intake to medically interesting levels, my hidden questioning of if I would be happier as a woman has yet to stop. With every new piece of smokey beef I force into my rebellious body, I expect a surge of male dominance, a life of not stopping to ask for directions. Yet every time I am once again torn to ruin, left wondering what if, and unable to stop my beef binge.
Car commercials continue to depict automobiles as secure, effective modes of transpiration. That is why I am constantly thrown for a loop whenever I run over a family of ducks. Does that sound like the idea of safety to you? Well then why do I continue to whisper, “It’s not your fault Honda Civic. You couldn’t have hurt those ducks. You are a sleek, innovative mode of transpiration. Violence is not within your wheelhouse. They probably all had some kind of duck disease that forces their bodies to implode at high velocities, and we just got here at the worst time.”? The answer is advertising.
All of these things are real world examples of how advertising warps our minds, forcing us into a state of psychosis doctor’s have described as “specific only to you” and “possibly publishable”. Don’t be a sheep. Tell companies how you really feel about their brainwashing by downloading Ad Blocker now.