5 Things You Need To Know When Dating A Shy Guy


1. He’s nervous almost all of the time.

His sweat glands are probably over exercised every time you are in the same room as him and every muscle in his body is fidgeting with glee. His mind races for possible conversation topics, but he cannot even formulate a sentence let alone have a conversation. He is NERVOUS. Like that same feeling you get when you’re about to go on stage for public speaking. Your conversations won’t flow flawlessly with him, and how can they when his heart is pumping so fast that the blood doesn’t stay long enough in his brain to do its thing? But this doesn’t mean that there is no potential for chemistry. When the guy is shy you have no choice but to be patient. Guide him in your conversations and hope that eventually he’ll be eased into talking to you and you can experience his real, awesome self instead of a fish trying to survive out of water.

2. He knows every single detail about you, without ever asking you.

He randomly asks you, “Are you feeling better?” when you never even told him that you’ve been fighting a cold for the past week. It is a bit creepy, until you realize that you are the one who’s been posting #sickselfies to your Instagram and whining about your blocked nose. He’s got your social media content down to a T — he’s even scrolled all the way down your Facebook timeline to your high school prom photos — but asking “How has your week been?” is much too hardcore for this shy dude. Don’t get creeped out though. Remember: you’ve done your fair share of stalking on other people’s Facebook pages too.

3. He doesn’t know how to approach you.

You probably find him stealing glances at you. He seems to always be in your periphery but never near enough to strike up a conversation. Shy guys do not know how to approach you. In fact, they do not know what to do with you. They’ve never seen a “playbook” nor have they ever had other guys teach them how to approach girls. The solution? You go up to him and say hello. After all, you’re not nervous or scared of approaching men, so why not do it? The whole he-must-come-talk-to-me-first rule is stupid and cannot apply to every situation, especially with shy guys. You’re a confident human being, just go talk to him.

4. His biggest fear is turning you off.

Whilst some guys have no fear in making themselves look like an asshole while trying to impress you, shy guys tend to back away from any expression of interest lest they should god forbid turn you off. They usually have low self-esteem and perceive your rejection as a direct insult to their self-worth. He is not one to arrange “I LOVE YOU” to be splayed across a staduim score board, nor is he one to blatantly ask you to go on some extravagant first date. His style is slow and subtle and often vague, but know that, when it comes down to it, he’s really just scared.

Reassurance is key. Acknowledge his minute but genuine gestures towards you. Even throw a couple compliments his way!

5. He wears his heart on his sleeve.

The irony with shy guys is that they actually wear their heart on their sleeve. Even though their efforts seem small and subtle, they are actually already putting so much of themselves on the line. Many guys out there do these big gestures for their ladies, but without any emotion behind it. Not the case with shy guys. Every little thing they do comes with a heap of emotions.

Know that as a lover of a shy guy, you will be one of the only few people he will and can be vulnerable around. He will open up to you in a way that is different from any relationship he’s ever had. Shy guys are probably the most sensitive creatures around which makes them awesome lovers too. They’re much more in tune with a woman’s feelings. Thought Catalog Logo Mark

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