You came into my life and offered me a love like fire – beautiful, tempting, and dangerous. And like a moth driven by curiosity, I drew closer and welcomed you without reservations.
What we had was one of a kind. It was something I’ve never felt before and I probably will never feel again for someone. What we had was raw emotions and uninhibited feelings. It was never calm nor was it ever patient. Our love was a roller coaster without the assurance of safety.
Our love was new and passionate. It was exhilarating!
But I wonder when it all changed because suddenly, our fire wasn’t beautiful anymore. It was excruciating. It became overwhelming but neither of us had the courage to put it out. Maybe we even felt that it was too wasteful to give up. So we deluded ourselves. We let the fire continue and we let it burn our hearts in the process. We lost sight of who were and who we wanted to be because we confined ourselves to what each other wanted and needed. Somewhere in the middle, we weren’t loving each other anymore, we were just too scared of the unknown that comes after if either of us gave up. We were hurting, but we pretended that we weren’t. We called it love even if we knew it wasn’t love anymore.
But, despite our desperate efforts, our fire ultimately burned out. We both got out of it, panting, crying, and unsure of what had just ended. All we knew was that everything hurt.
Still, it ended. Finally, it ended.
We could blame timing, fate, or some other abstract thing for what happened to us but the reality is, when love burns you to the point where it hurts, then someone has to let go. Someone has to be brave enough to put out the fire before the damage becomes irreversible.
So, thank you. Thank you for being the brave one. Whatever it was that we had, may it be love or some other feeling, thank you for giving up on it first.
And it took me a lot of time, but I am okay now. Everything is calm and I’m alone again but my soul is at ease. I’m not catching my breath or crying my heart out. I’m not begging for love and I don’t feel insecure. I’m not fighting for attention and I no longer equate my worth to the love I’ve been offered. I no longer confuse passion for love and I’m no longer afraid to give up on things that are toxic to me. I’m not burning anymore. I am at peace. With myself. With you. With us and how our love ended.