11 Things You Know To Be True If You’re The Child Of An Addict

Person in winter jacket looks out a foggy forestscape on a hike
Luke Pamer / Unsplash

“The worst thing is watching someone drown and not being able to convince them that they can save themselves by just standing up.”

1.

We know what it’s like to be scared. Scared of what the future holds, and who we may lose. Scared to have our own children, because our damage may “rub off” on them.

2.

Our “normal” is very different than most. Yes, it’s a relative term, but what we consider to be normal isn’t on the average relativity scale.

3.

Life is precious, and we realize that. There is no guarantee that your loved ones will be around forever, so we know to appreciate and savor every single moment. We make the best out of every situation we encounter, conscious of the simple fact that it could be much worse.

4.

We will say no. We know how to think with our head instead of our heart.

5.

We know what it’s like to feel guilty, or like it’s our fault that our parent made/makes bad choices. We understand feeling like you aren’t good enough, and we tend to be hard on ourselves.

6.

We can be a bit controlling and we want to be in charge. This is because at some point, we’ve been forced to make decisions for a parent who couldn’t.

7.

If you say it, you better mean it. We remember how it felt to have our bags packed up, waiting for our parent to pick us up on the weekend, but they never show. So mean what you say, and follow through, because we’re also pretty good at cutting people out of our life completely.

8.

We can detect a lie from a mile away, and we are not easily fooled. Growing up with a parent who is an addict, you rapidly learn how to spot a lie because you hear them all the time.

9.

We know the power of forgiveness. You can only hold onto resentment or guilt for so long before it eats you alive. Forgiveness and acceptance allowed are the two things that have allowed us to finally let go.

10.

We are hard workers due to having the absolute greatest motivation of all. We know what we don’t want to be, and will fight tooth and nail to ensure that we don’t end up like them.

11.

We are warriors, we are strong, we love hard and unconditionally. We know what it’s like to never be put first and that is a blessing, because we recognize the importance of putting others first so that no one ever feels the way we have. We know that life is hard from time to time, but we are so much harder, and we fight for what we want. TC mark

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