1. He started reading the Bible and believed he was the second coming of Jesus Christ. Not joking.
“He started reading the Bible and believed he was the second coming of Jesus Christ. Not joking.”
2. He called me during his bachelor party. To apologize for fucking a stripper…while still fucking the stripper.
“He called me during his bachelor party. To apologize for fucking a stripper…while still fucking the stripper. That was the end of that.”
3. He picked me up over his head & threw me down a flight of stairs just because I didn’t agree with him on a minor matter.
“He was a linebacker, I weighed 85 pounds. He picked me up over his head & threw me down a flight of stairs just because I didn’t agree with him on a minor matter. I decided then & there that this wasn’t how I wanted to live the rest of my life. It would only get worse. So I left.”
4. He got in my face and threatened to choke me to death.
“He tried to ‘hang’ himself by looping a belt around his neck and pulling the other end up with his hand because I wanted to take a quick trip out of state to check on my grandfather. Then he tried to put his head through the wall when I didn’t react to the belt situation. THEN he got in my face and threatened to choke me to death.
I called his mother, calmly packed my bags, went to check on my grandfather, and decided not to return.
5. Honestly, he kept bugging the shit out of me for anal sex and I couldn’t take it anymore.
“Honestly, he kept bugging the shit out of me for anal sex and I couldn’t take it anymore. After we got engaged he became obsessed with it and it’s something that just repulses me, also, he had a HUGE dick so I was afraid that it would hurt. I really, really didn’t want to do it, but he persisted.
I finally told him I would do it on the condition that he let me fuck him in the butt with a strap-on afterwards so he would have to feel what I was going through. That was a big hell no… He left me alone about it for about a month, but then it started again.
He stopped having regular sex with me because I wouldn’t do it, so finally I was like fuck this. I’m not going to spend the rest of my life being bothered about anal, which I DON’T want to do. If you loved me you would respect that.
So I broke up with him.
The most awkward part for both of us was trying to think of reasons to tell friends and family when they asked what the hell happened, because otherwise we were great together.”
6. He was genuinely upset I was begging him to stay with me and be there when I woke up from an EMERGENCY APPENDECTOMY.
“While It was never a healthy relationship to begin with, it took something really big to grab my attention.
Four months after we got engaged, he gave me the silent treatment on our way to the hospital. I had severe abdominal pains, but he had a grad school test the next day that was more important to him. I demanded we go to the hospital and he refused to speak to me until hours later, when it was diagnosed as ruptured appendicitis. He thought I was making it up to inconvenience him.
And then right before surgery he said, ‘well now that you know what it is can I go home and study? I can’t miss this test!’ He was genuinely upset I was begging him to stay with me and be there when I woke up from an EMERGENCY APPENDECTOMY.
Motherfucker didn’t even want to wait around to see if I survived surgery for a ruptured appendix. It took me about eight months to break it off, but that was the end.”
7. He was cheating on me with a girl from his job.
“He was cheating on me with a girl from his job. I helped him get a better job since he was making minimum wage at McDonald’s before. He was also very immature and I realize now that him cheating on me was the best thing that could have happened.”
8. Apparently once we got engaged he decided he had me on lockdown and started cheating on me with multiple women.
“Apparently once we got engaged he decided he had me on lockdown and started cheating on me with multiple women. Since we were only engaged everything was still in my name only (he had shit credit) so it was real easy to boot his ass out.”
9. We were planning the wedding while I was realistically picturing myself as divorced in five years. That was stupid, and I ended it.
“First, he changed, big time. He became controlling, jealous, and seemed to really expect that we’d reenact his parents wildly dysfunctional marriage. Repeated long talks about it didn’t change anything.
There came a point where we were planning the wedding while I was realistically picturing myself as divorced in five years. That was stupid, and I ended it. We’re both married to other people for over 25 years now, but he was bitter and mean the last time we ran into each other. I dodged such a bullet.”
10. I fell in love with my childhood best friend, had a kid together, got engaged, found out he was cheating on me possibly because he’s gay or just because he’s a jerk. So much sad.
“We were friends for almost 15 years. Lived together as roommates, then finally one thing led to another. We had been together for about six months when I found out I was pregnant. He was incredibly supportive, I was so happy.
We have the baby and then he asks me to marry him a few months later on New Year’s Eve. Of course I say yes.
We move along, planning the wedding about a year and a half out (it would have been this November). We have our arguments, I keep getting a weird feeling in my gut but learn to the ignore it.
I had always known he wasn’t entirely straight, but then again, I hadn’t always been either so I trusted that he had made a commitment to me and that should have been that.
It came out in an argument this past January. He had been chatting and exchanging pictures with who knows how many guys all over the metro area. He claimed he hadn’t actually met with or slept with any of them (because THAT was the time he was being truthful?).
I was heartbroken but tried to stay for our child. I finally realized how stupid that was in May and moved back in with my (freaking awesome) parents.
It’s awkward, because I don’t necessarily feel like it’s my place to ‘out’ him to our friends. My family knows the basic details and that’s all they’ll ever get. But I know he walks around saying it was a mutual thing and every time that gets back to me it’s like all the air is being knocked out of me over and over. If your two choices are being absolutely miserable and being alone but possibly happy, what do you “choose?”
Idk, TLDR; fell in love with my childhood best friend, had a kid together, got engaged, found out he was cheating on me possibly because he’s gay or just because he’s a jerk. So much sad.”
11. We talked, and he admitted that he’s in love with her and doesn’t want to be with me anymore.
“We were together for 9.5 years. Set to be married on our 10-year anniversary. He started hanging out at work a lot more than normal (happy hour, company outings, etc.). He started to develop a friendship with a female coworker. I’ve had platonic male friends my entire life so NBD. But one time my best friend and I were playfully teasing that this female friend was his girlfriend…and he got real mad almost instantly. After that I knew they were together but didn’t want to admit it. I went on a weekend beach vacation with my best friend, and he went camping with her and a gay couple. I’m sure they slept together that weekend if they already hadn’t. About a month later he went to a work event and purposefully made it difficult for me to attend, to the point of saying ‘I don’t really want you to go.’ She posted a status on Facebook and tagged him in it and I went ballistic. Called him and demanded he come home. We talked, and he admitted that he’s in love with her and doesn’t want to be with me anymore. Eight months before the wedding. Three years engaged. I moved out three weeks later. Took the dog and cat.
He tries to text me every so often. I don’t respond.”
12. I dodged marrying a pedo.
“I called off my wedding 3 months before it happened. Why? I was a 17-year-old (I’d have been 18 at the time of the wedding) about to marry a 26-year-old man that had been dating me for 3 years. I was a victim about to marry her abuser.
The engagement ring, which I did eventually find out was fake (he has money. Lots of it, but that didn’t matter to me) was to buy my consent/silence/whatever as he stuck his dick in everything that moved. He was an alcoholic, a narcissist, a pedophile (seriously, I wasn’t a 14-year-old that looked like an 18-year-old. I was a 14-year-old that looked like a 12-year-old.)
I loved him because I thought he was saving me from my horrid situation with my family. My mom and I moved in with her boyfriend, only to find out too late that he was an abuser. He’d take me away from it, even if it was just for a little while.
I was so messed up. I ended up living in a boarding house when things finally broke in my abusive household because, of course, I was 17 and he didn’t want me to move in until I turned 18 (his career depended on a squeaky-clean image.) I ended up pregnant, having a violent end to my pregnancy that resulted in my daughter’s stillbirth.
Despite this all, I loved him. But he started picking at my appearance. I was ‘gaining too much weight’ even though I was at a healthy weight for my age/height. I had gotten hips and breasts…so we talked about dieting. I stopped eating. I drank water when I’d get hungry. Everything had to be low fat/no fat, low calorie/no calorie, and sugar free. It worked. I went from ‘healthy’ to ‘underweight.’ What made me realize that I wanted out was a box of chicken wings.
I ended up moving back in with my mother after she was able to escape her ex. We lived near an indoor flea market/farmer’s market that had the most amazing food vendors. I love food, and this diet was killing me. I was fucking miserable. So, I decided to have a cheat day, and I went and ordered a box of hot wings from the chicken place in the farmer’s market. As I sat down with my favorite movie, eating my favorite food, I realized that the extreme dieting would always be my life. I also realized that he wanting me to be so unhealthy wasn’t right. I was tired all the time, cold all the time, hungry all the time. I decided, while happily munching on that box of wings, I was done.
I called him, told him that I was done. It took me another 3 years to truly be done, but the very expensive wedding was done and over. He never got any deposits back. It took me almost a decade to realize that he wanted me to look like a 14-year-old forever. I was also always dismissive about the age difference, citing that I was mature for my age. I now realize it didn’t matter. I was a child.
TL;DR: I dodged marrying a pedo.”
13. I did not see a life with someone who had no respect for me, whose friends treated me like shit, and thought it was cool to spend all night out drinking while his wife and kids sat at home wondering where the hell he was.
“We started dating sophomore year of community college and dated for five years. I transferred to a four-year university while he stayed home for and became a fireman/paramedic. I graduated from college and moved home with him into a house that we picked out together and he bought. We got a puppy and a kitten together. I thought we were happy together. We talked seriously about getting married, and he proposed. While we were living together, I started noticing how much he drank—several times he got blackout drunk and puked everywhere. He played video games for hours on his days off, and would play in the evenings at the firehouse too. He had some friends who were awful to me, as well as his brother. We would have everyone over to the house and I would clean everything from top to bottom and cook for everyone, and they would be complete assholes to me.
I started noticing him talking to a girl on a Facebook game a lot, so I looked her up. She was what we call a ‘badge bunny’—a girl who loves to chase police and firemen. Lots of racy photos with fire hats, hoses , etc. I told him to block and stop talking to her, or I was gone. He grudgingly stopped.
The final straw was when he left to go to the casino with one of his buddies and simply didn’t come back. I called and texted both of them. His friend was married and was good about going home to his wife, so I was pretty sure they weren’t together. By 8 am the next day I was exhausted from crying, and he finally dragged his ass back home. Turns out he had gotten shit-faced with a bunch of people he’d met after his friend went home, and had spent the night sleeping in his truck in the casino parking lot. I was glad he didn’t drive drunk, but not telling me where he was or answering any of my phone calls was not okay with me. I asked him if he intended to do this kind of shit while we were married and had a couple of kids, and his answer was yes. At that point, I grew a spine and told him I was done. I did not see a life with someone who had no respect for me, whose friends treated me like shit, and thought it was cool to spend all night out drinking while his wife and kids sat at home wondering where the hell he was. I am so. So. Glad. That I didn’t go through with the wedding.”
14. I wanted children. I wanted to be a mother to his children. He said he had zero interest in being a father.
“The day we got engaged, is the day we found out I was pregnant. It was truly the most emotional day of my life. The test strip read positive and we had a conversation about our parental readiness; that resulted in a decision to terminate the pregnancy. He was getting deployed for six months and I was due to start school one week before the expected birthdate. Upon arrival to the doctor’s office, I am met with horrible news. There’s no heartbeat. An enormous part of my heart dove deeper than the Marianas Trench. Nothing in this world could have prepared me to hear those words or to see an ultrasound of a deceased being within my bones. I immediately regretted even for a second that I wasn’t going to take responsibility for my child, had he/she/it been born. The same day as my appointment was the same day he left. The physical and emotional pain of watching him leave and the small piece of life we had created together crumbled. I stuck it out til he came back, never telling him how depressed I was or the fact that my life had forever changed. When he returned from deployment, I couldn’t hold it in anymore. I wanted children. I wanted to be a mother to his children. He said he had zero interest in being a father. Two weekends ago, I was invited to his parents’ home (where he had been living after his deployment), 250 miles from where I currently reside; only to be told it was over. Our 3-year relationship dove head-first into the ground. I drove home alone. I’m still alone. Our engagement lasted 8 months. And yes, I was 100% sure he was ‘the one’ until the morning he ended the relationship.”
15. Got an email from him saying he’d screwed somebody else while he was on tour.
“Got an email from him saying he’d screwed somebody else while he was on tour. I had been having that awful feeling in my gut—that your partner can’t be trusted—for years despite a lack of any evidence, so this confession was kind of a relief.
Without the slightest hesitation, I wrote back ‘OK, don’t bother coming home.’
Took all his shit to his friend’s house, mailed the ring and our shared credit card to his mother, with a card I made from a collage of his love letters, which I had cut up and rearranged to say something spiteful. After meeting once or twice to talk, I decided I’d rather have nothing to do with him.
Later I found out this was only the tip of the iceberg as far as his infidelities were concerned. Women, men, prostitutes, every time my back was turned.
I found out later he even molested his own son, who was conceived with a woman he started screwing while we were together.
So, dodged a bullet there I suppose.”
16. He admitted to having made out with ‘more women than he would like to admit’ the year prior.
“A few things:
He admitted to having made out with ‘more women than he would like to admit’ the year prior. He needed to clear his conscience, he said. Turns out some friends of ours saw him and threatened to tell me if he didn’t.
I wanted to keep my last name legally and use his last name socially. He fought me tooth and nail on that one. I found out who my real father was a little late in life and have developed a very strong sense of identity with that name. It means a lot to me.
He put a lot of pressure on me to make more money. He reduced me to tears on several different occasions. He is an officer in the Army. I am a baker. We lived well within our means and were comfortable. I love my job. He also expected me to quit my job once he was ready to start having kids.
I try to be honest about everything, because that’s what I do. We would tell each other when we found others to be sexually attractive. One day, I told him about a recent friend whom I found attractive and all the sudden he got super jealous. He said to me ‘you need to tell me that I’m the only person you will ever love.’ I told him that was unrealistic.
He was a mean drunk.
When I told him I thought we should split up, he agreed with me. He didn’t try fighting it.
Four and a half years with him and it was over in a five-minute discussion. He proposed in January of this year and I left him in March. Since then, all of my anxiety induced health issues have gone away. I am dating someone new who gratifies me very much sexually and emotionally, and I got a promotion at work!
The last thing he said to me before I left the house was, ‘I thought loving you would be enough.’
Thanks for the burn, bro.”
17. I couldn’t marry a man who would let someone belittle his wife to tears.
“Once the ring was on, his mother stopped playing nice and revealed the very controlling and manipulative person she was. She literally tried to control every decision we made and got nasty when I pushed back. She especially took issue that my family wasn’t as wealthy as theirs, and that I worked, which meant we split household chores. She flipped out once over us taking turns doing dishes because she didn’t believe her son should be cleaning at all.
I had a civil conversation with her about boundaries. My fiancé and I were 30 and could make our own choices. In the next couple days, all his siblings called, concerned I was forcing him to cut contact with all of them. Not at all what the boundaries conversation was!
I could write a novel about all the games and psychological abuse she pulled, but at the end of the day, my ex-fiancé was a coward who couldn’t stand any confrontation. I couldn’t marry a man who would let someone belittle his wife to tears.
Broke up 2 weeks before the wedding. No regrets, just relief. Some years later, I’m engaged to a better man with a lovely mother.”