32 Women Share The Dumbest ‘Compliment’ A Guy Ever Tried To Give Them

Illustration by Daniella Urdinlaiz
Illustration by Daniella Urdinlaiz
Found on AskReddit.

1. “You’re not like other girls.”

“‘You’re not like other girls.’ What’s wrong with other girls?”

BonnieZoom


2. “You look hot when you’re mad.”

“‘You look hot when you’re mad.’ Thanks, you look like a dick all the time.”

batterymoose


3. “Your body is amazing for having three kids.”

“‘Your body is amazing…wait for it…for having three kids.’”

SheWhoComesFirst


4. “Damnnnn girl, you’re built like a Chevy truck!”

“‘Damnnnn girl, you’re built like a Chevy truck!’ The fuck?”

_Ignorance_Is_Bliss


5. “You’re pretty, but you talk too much.”

“‘You’re pretty, but you talk too much.’

…thanks?”

poopsiegirl


6. “You look okay for an average woman.”

“I got this one on OKCupid a few weeks ago: ‘You look okay for an average woman.’ :(”

Novah11


7. “You don’t sweat much for a fat chick.”

“‘You don’t sweat much for a fat chick.’”

RoboNinjaPirate


8. “Hey there, milk chocolate, African princess, Nubian queen.”

“When people call me milk chocolate, African princess, Nubian queen. Like, calm down.”

LaurdAlmighty


9. “Hey, I noticed you have a massive scar, but it looks good on you!”

“A guy desperate for attention: ‘Hey, I noticed you have [insert flaw]…but it looks good on you!’

The flaw is usually something pretty obvious that others are aware of but too polite to bring up: like a massive scar, messed-up teeth, or a slightly lazy eye.

Thanks, I’m aware of that particular feature and I try not to think about it or draw attention to it. Now my self-esteem is shot.”

XenaWPM


10. “I like your smile and want to cum on your dimples.”

“One time a guy in high school said he liked my smile and wanted to cum on my dimples. It was the first time we had met.”

aheelam


11. “You sure are smart for a girl.”

“Any compliment that follows the ‘you sure are x for a y.’ Such as, ‘you sure are pretty for a woman your age.’ Or ‘you sure are smart for a girl.’

Just bad form all around.”

clearingpuppy


12. “I like women like you. Cute, but not pretty.”

“‘I like women like you. Cute, but not pretty.’ Also, every time my family takes out our boat and puts it in the water I do the rope (pull it to the dock when it floats off the trailer). A man offers to help, I refuse, and then they comment on how amazing it is I was able to do that. I’ve been doing it since I was 9; it’s not hard at all…”

Kckc321


13. “You look great for your age.”

“You look great for your age.”

tbeary1


14. “You’re so pretty for being Mexican.”

“I think the best one recently is, ‘Oh, you don’t look like you’re Mexican.’ ‘You’re so pretty for being Mexican.’ Like what???? Am I supposed to have sombrero and mustache, orrrrrr???”

offensiveminds


15. “Just thought you should know, you have some really big boobs.”

“Men who feel the need to point out how big my tits are. A guy that I saw around campus DM’ed me on Instagram and said, ‘just thought you should know, you have some really big boobs.’ No shit, they aren’t on my chest or anything.”

captyoyogirl


16. “You’re too pretty to be Latina.”

“‘You’re too pretty to be Latina’ and all of its variations. Dude, Latin America is full of beautiful women and also full of ugly women, just like any other part of the world. Insulting my ethnicity won’t get you anywhere…”

EpicBaconStrip


17. “Nice eyes, I would love to see them looking up at me while you suck my cock.”

“I tried to think of something edgy, but I appreciate the guts it takes to say almost all compliments unless they’re super vulgar right out of the gate.

IE: ‘Nice eyes, I would love to see them looking up at me while you suck my cock.’

Uh…what. Hi, nice to meet you?”

alissatron


18. “I bet you taste great.”

“When a guy you just met makes lewd ‘compliments,’ such as ‘I bet you taste great.’”

funchy


19. “Girl, you look like Black Jesus.”

“I’m a black chick with dreadlocks so I attract a lot of hoteps and weird ‘spiritual’ old dudes. I’ve been told I look like ‘black Jesus’ and ‘one of the original Hebrews—you know they were African. They don’t want you to know your history!!’”

ImmaculateDishes


20. “You’re hot for whatever race you are.”

“‘You’re hot for whatever race you are.’ Tinder deleted.”

highly_caffinated


21. “A lesbian? But you’re so pretty, you could find a boyfriend real quick.”

“‘A lesbian? But you’re so pretty, you could find a boyfriend real quick.’”

katieames


22. “You look like a sexy sausage.”

“I was wearing a form-fitting dress and my boyfriend of the time said, ‘you look like a sexy sausage.’ There was a lot of explaining and backtracking afterwards.”

Moar_Cuddles_Please


23. “You’re so small and cute. I want to pick you up and put you in my pocket.”

“‘You’re so small and cute. I want to pick you up and put you in my pocket.’

I may be a short Chinese woman, but I’m 30 ffs.”

bobsparkless


24. “You’d be really pretty if you tried.”

“‘You’d be really pretty if you tried.’

Thanks, asshat.”

duckyblinders


25. “You are pretty, but not conventionally pretty.”

“You are pretty, but not conventionally pretty.”

ahinsomnia


26. “You’re pretty for a black girl.”

“‘You’re pretty for a black girl.’ It’s a slap to the face, never was a compliment. You’re basically saying ‘wow you’re actually very attractive to be a part of such an ugly race.’ Also, asking me if I’m mixed just because you think I’m pretty. No. I’m not.”

i_got_yo_man


27. “Heyyyy, you and your mother look like sisters! Can I date both of you?”

“I have one that never fails to incur a gagging reflex. ‘Heyyyy, you and your mother look like sisters! Can I date both of you?’ said in the most salacious voice with accompanying indiscreet wink and vulgar laugh. Oh, I’ve received this comment or some variation about once a week. Yesterday my next door neighbor’s builder shouted down from his scaffolding about how ‘bangable’ my mother is and he’d do me too! His apprentice or younger coworker joked ‘What, at the same time?’ to raucous laughter. :(

It’s apparent to anyone who’s seen my mother that she has a youthful countenance and we resemble each other but refrain from implying incest in your quest for a date! It’s repugnant and I doubt any women on earth would reciprocate.”

VelvetDreamers


28. “You don’t LOOK like an engineer.”

“‘You don’t LOOK like an engineer.’ No shit Sherlock, turns out ‘looks’ aren’t a requirement for being an engineer. Hard work and solving problems is. Don’t dwindle me down to just my looks.”

dreamcatcher32


29. “I’m not intimidated by a curvy woman.”

“‘I’m not intimidated by a curvy woman.’

Curvy now means fat, so thanks. And, it was extra offensive because he had just hit on my friend first and it was HIS bachelor party going on at the bar -_”

pagirl023


30. “Those are some nice thunder thighs.”

“‘Those are some nice thunder thighs.’…never tell a woman she has thunder thighs.”

whale_wars_


31. “You used to be so ugly, but oh my God you’re gorgeous now.”

“‘You used to be so ugly, but oh my God you’re gorgeous now.’

As if that’s going to make me want anything to do with you.”

cactusqueen7


32. “Damn girl! You got a fat pussy!”

“My friend told me this story. She was working as a bartender downtown that had uniforms; tight black leather shorts. She walked in and the bouncer yelled, ‘Damn girl! You got a fat pussy!’ Since then when we meet up at a club it’s the first thing I say to her.”

corvidae_mantra TC mark

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