1. It’s a choice. Unfortunately, not mine.
“It’s a choice. Unfortunately, not mine.”
2. I’m broke.
“No money, no honey :)”
3. I know how to masturbate.
“Because I can masturbate.”
4. I don’t know how to flirt.
“Because I don’t know how to flirt.”
5. I’ve just stopped trying.
“I’ve just stopped trying. I’m too awkward to connect with most people on a romantic level, and the times I have connected with someone, they’ve almost invariably turned out to be toxic in one form or other. I do get lonely, but I’ve found that’s a lot less painful than either rejection or just being with a very wrong person.”
6. I’m fat and shy.
“Being fat and shy surely isn’t helping me out.”
7. I’m not attractive.
I’m not attractive.
I don’t drink or go to bars.
I’m either at work or at home.
I work at a crappy retail job.
And I’m 28, and live with my mom due to extenuating circumstances.
EDIT: I have a B.S. and work crappy retail so I’m depressed about life all the time.”
8. I’m not attracted to girls in my league.
“I’m not attracted to girls in my league.”
9. I gave my heart to someone, she tore it to pieces, and I haven’t been able to convince myself that it’s worth trying again.
“Because I gave my heart to someone, she tore it to pieces, and I haven’t been able to convince myself that it’s worth trying again.”
10. I’m insecure and like being free.
My mom racked up 6 divorces, my dad had 4. Just working on my career for now. If love happens, it happens.
The likely (real) answer is that I don’t put myself in positions to meet new people, and dating apps suck.”
11. I’m afraid of ruining friendships.
“Because I’m afraid if asking a friend out and being told no, and then our friendship becoming awkward. And slowly ever so slowly it whittles away into nothing and I never see that person again. But the only way for me to feel remotely attracted to anyone enough to date them is to get to know them over time. But by the time I get there I decide a sure friendship is better than a possible relationship.”
12. I live in the desert.
“There are plenty of fish in the sea. Unfortunately, I live in the desert.”
13. I don’t speak with people.
“I don’t dare speak with people.”
14. I am very bad at picking up on signals.
“I am very bad at picking up on signals.”
15. It has been a difficult mating season for bird person.
“It has been a difficult mating season for bird person.”
16. I’m shy when it comes to meeting complete strangers.
“Because I suck dick at text communication and I’m shy when it comes to meeting complete strangers (i.e. on the street, grocery store, bus stop, I just can’t initiate a conversation, scare myself shitless). Then when situations do come up where I can meet someone new (like a party), we usually get along great and have plans to hang out again, but then once I send a text or two it’s over.
This also rules out online dating or anything like that. Then my friends pretty much all moved away. Damnit I’m lonely, but at least if I get this job I just interviewed for I’ll have a work schedule that will allow me to join clubs, so that would be nice.”
17. I think my standards are too high.
“I think my standards are too high and I’m too shy. Damn.”
18. I am sort of selfish.
“Cause I am sort of selfish, and want to do what I want when I want. I can be alone without being lonely!”
19. I am mentally ill.
“Mental health issues! I would be a burden on any partner, and I can’t fathom what anyone would get out of a relationship with me.”
20. I’m on the spectrum.
“Because I’m on the spectrum and it is a very cruel thing to subject someone to dating me.”
21. I’m fat, lazy, and don’t ask a lot of girls out.
“Cause I’m #1. fat, and #2. don’t ask a lot of girls out. Both things I can fix but #3. I’m lazy.”
22. I recently got out of a 4-year relationship.
“Recently just got out of a 4-year relationship and am super bummed out about it.”
23. I’m an underqualified 41-year-old.
“Because I’m a 41-year-old with all the qualifications and achievements of a 19-year-old.”
24. I’ve been picking myself up from a deep depression and bad breakup.
“I’ve been spending the last 5 years focusing on being the best dad I can be, and picking myself up from a deep depression and bad breakup. Now I’m finally feeling like my own solid person and have tried to date. I haven’t really found someone who I had that spark with, and I’m so busy that it’s hard to imagine having time to even try to have a relationship.
That being said, I’ve gone out with this awesome woman a couple times now and she just asked me out on an official date, so we’ll see.”
25. I enjoy being single.
“Honestly I enjoy being single. I’ve only ever had one girlfriend and that also kind of left a sour taste in my mouth. I’m just someone who really enjoys spending time with myself.”
26. I’m an unattractive loser with self-esteem issues.
“Because I’m an unattractive loser with self-esteem issues.”
27. I’m still in love with my ex.
“I’m still in love with my ex. It’s been awhile (6 months) but I’d prefer to remain uninvolved while I get over it. I’ve attempted to get out there some, and when I go to the bar girls talk to me, but in the end I never get much farther than getting a number and trading texts for a day before I call it off because I know that even if they are into me, I can’t reciprocate in earnest. The ex is not an option either (anybody with an ex from a serious relationship can understand why).”
28. I love being single.
“Being single is like total freedom. When I want to do something or go somewhere, I love not having to think about anyone else. I just do it. Am I open to finding someone compatible with my interests to do things with? Yes. But I’m not in a huge rush.”
29. I’m tired of being in relationships.
“I’m single because I’m tired of being in relationships. Being in a relationship is a full-time job whether people realize that or not. It’s now become a mixture of a fear of commitment, not finding the rightish person, and just genuinely enjoying going off the grid for a week without having to consistently text/call somebody. The moment it feels like work, that’s the moment I hit the road. Pretty selfish and a bit cowardly, but I am the man I am.
tl;dr I suck at being a boyfriend for more than a month.”
30. She left me two weeks ago.
“Because she left me two weeks ago.”
31. I’m a very boring guy.
“I’m a very boring guy. I don’t drink, I don’t smoke, I don’t do anything fun anymore.”
32. I am fat, lazy, and hate myself.
“Because I am fat, lazy, and hate myself. I barely have the motivation to do things I enjoy. I’ve also never tried to get a girlfriend and the way I see it is if I don’t try to improve myself then I’ll never get one.”
33. I have male pattern baldness.
“Never had really had any interest in dating, I’m rather weird in some ways and not particularly interesting (and rather self-conscious about my appearance, fuck you male pattern baldness), I struggle to look after/care about myself, let alone finding the motivation/time/money involved with dating, frankly I’d be rather surprised/concerned/indifferent if a woman showed any interest in me, it would make more sense to get my shit in order properly before I think about burdening someone else with my problems, at this point I’m so used to having (and enjoying) my own freedom that embarking on a relationship seems kinda terrifying and not something that particularly interests me at this point in time. I’m probably Asexual, and a rather pessimistic introverted one at that, it’s not exactly something the ladies go for.”
34. I’m not tall and handsome.
“But really it’s because I’m not a tall, handsome, truck driving, dirt mudding cowboy and I didn’t get the memo that I was supposed to lock down my first girlfriend and get married right after graduation.”
35. I’ve never been chosen.
“Just never been chosen, other than once in the past. Once you get used to it you need someone else’s help to get out of the rut, and since no one helped then you don’t really think anyone’s going to help now. Confidence has to be earned or else you know it’s just fake.”
36. I have yet to find another girl that would make me want to give up on all the rest.
“Mostly, because of this quote from Hunter Thompson:
‘We are all alone, born alone, die alone, and—in spite of True Romance magazines—we shall all someday look back on our lives and see that, in spite of our company, we were alone the whole way. I do not say lonely—at least, not all the time—but essentially, and finally, alone. This is what makes your self-respect so important, and I don’t see how you can respect yourself if you must look in the hearts and minds of others for your happiness.’
In addition to that:
I am actively trying to live my life with less responsibilities and obligations. Coupled with this, I have yet to find another girl that would make me want to give up on all the rest. Therefore, I do not want to waste someone else’s time and especially do not want to hurt their feelings over a relationship I am not 100% committed to…”
37. I’m a complete outcast and I have no chance with any girl.
“I’m a complete outcast and I have no chance with any girl. I’m homeschooled and I have no neighbors my age.”
38. I’m more interested in getting good grades.
“Grades before babes.”
39. I keep comparing every girl to ‘the one that got away’ a few years ago
“I keep comparing every girl to ‘the one that got away’ a few years ago.”
40. I take anti-depressants and they destroyed my libido.
“My long bout with depression and anti-depressants has completely eroded my libido and general desire to even talk to women in an exciting way. I’m mostly back to myself again and in some way better and more disciplined than I was before the depression, but my “drive” has never come back, so I don’t pursue anything romantic.”
41. I’m not quite attractive enough to attract girls I’m attracted to.
“I’m attractive but not quite attractive enough to attract girls I’m attracted to. Also I’m quiet and shy.”
42. I’m the ugly one.
“I’m the ugly one out of my buds haha. I worked to get fit thinking it would help. It didn’t really haha. I’m still only 5’6, with a face only my mother can tolerate and pretty much any opportunity I would have involves me being compared to my much more tall, handsome, and fit friends.
I’m mostly invisible, and women (including waitresses and the like) treat my friends noticeably better. Probably afraid I’ll think they like me if they are considerably nice to me LOL.
I’ve been in relationships but they all started when the person knew my personality before they knew my looks. After a while my looks get too much. The last girl said she would never be physically attracted to me no matter what I do hahaha!
Anyways I guess the reason is pretty funny lol.”
43. I’m an ugly handicapped person.
“Well, there’s a few reasons
I’m awkward socially.
I’m an ugly handicapped person.
I don’t go out.
I don’t want to be in a relationship.
Unfortunately, I still fall in love with girls uncontrollably.”
44. I’m too fucking cheap and I don’t care.
“Because I’m too fucking cheap. And I don’t care.”
45. I’m asexual.
“My aggressive asexuality. Not that asexual people can’t be in relationships, but your dating options are pretty limited when sex isn’t on your agenda.”
46. I’m pretty good a ruining relationships as soon as they start to get too serious.
“I’m pretty good a ruining relationships as soon as they start to get too serious. I’m fine just dating and having fun, but once it’s a borderline relationship, I always screw it up. Only recently did a friend point out that I was doing it on purpose, whether I was aware of it or not.”
47. I suffer from severe mental illnesses, live on disability and almost never go outside.
“I suffer from severe mental illnesses, live on disability and almost never go outside. I also realize I can only be happy when I’m dating someone, but that in itself isn’t healthy. I need to be happy with myself in order to have a healthy relationship. But that will never happen, so I remain alone.”
48. I walk a lonely road.
“I walk a lonely road, the only one that I have ever known.”
49. I prefer being single.
“The relationships I have been in.
• Pressure to get married
• Pressure to have kids
• Pressure to put her before me
• Pressure to buy a bunch of stuff
• Pressure to settle
• Relationships are expensive, time and money
• Trying to control me
• Told that I need to compromise
• I’m selfish
• The pre relationship phase
• Pressure to get into a relationship right away
• Wanting to dig into my phone, snoop
• Try and change me
• Not appreciate who I’m and what I’m about
Things about relationships, before or after
• High divorce rate
• Men will usually get ruined in a divorce
• Kids are a lifelong commitment and expensive
• Wife/Mother will make your life hell if you don’t do what she wants because she knows divorce will usually end up ruining your life
• Do anything you want
• A lot more money to enjoy
• A lot less stress
• More sexual partners
• Little commitment, easy to move on
• Women are less controlling and abusive
• More sex
• Willing to contribute more
• They know you have options if you’re not in a relationship so they’re more willing to do things for longer”
50. I’m tired of trying to figure out which woman won’t treat me like shit.
“Honestly, I’m just tired of trying to figure out which woman won’t treat me like shit.”
51. I’m afraid
“Fear mostly. Fear of being happy, fear of the unknown, fear of accepting that I am worth something, and fear of rejection. So I disengaged myself. Totally a coward’s way out, but it helps me sleep just a little better at night.”
52. I’m mental.
“Because I’m mental, I have social anxiety, depression and enjoy things like video games and fishing, so I do the things I enjoy instead of being in a relationship that feels so required by society to be ‘complete.’”
53. I have a micropenis.
“My running nickname among my friends is ‘one-inch wonder.’”