1. He gave me a little box of chocolates, but he’d already eaten half of them.
“When we were dating my husband bought a little box of chocolates ‘for me,’ but had already eaten half of them because he wanted to try them, too. I still make fun of him for it.”
2. He showed me his tattoos of various My Little Ponies.
“Showing me his tattoos of various My Little Ponies. He was so excited to show me, he thought I was going to be blown away by it.”
3. He told me he hung up my picture so he could see it while in the shower and he was masturbating to it.
“I met a guy via online dating. We went to dinner. He was telling me how much he loved one of my photos on the site. So much, he said, he hung it up so he could see it while in the shower and he was masturbating to it.”
4. Why? Is your nose bigger than your dick?
“I once had a guy message me and his opening line was, ‘Hey, wanna sit on my face?’
I responded with ‘Why? Is your nose bigger than your dick?’
He blocked me after that.”
5. He called me his number-one girl…out of seven.
“I dated this guy for like, a week in junior college. Still very much in the ‘getting to know you’ stage. It became really obvious early on he was one of those guys that try to put you down so you’ll think you’re lucky he’s even talking to you but I’d just answer every subtle insult with a ‘…K.’
We were hanging out and he says something like, ‘You’re my number-one girl.’ Kind of a weird thing to say at this point in the game, all right. I jokingly said, ‘Oh yeah? Out of how many?’ He makes this big show out of counting on his fingers and pretends to try remembering all the names in his binders full of women before he says, ‘Seven.’ I was like, ‘Haha, OK, well, I don’t think I could compete with seven. Good luck with that,’ and stopped taking his calls.”
6. He told me he masturbated to me but had never been able to finish.
“He told me he masturbated to me. And then when I was uncomfortable he tried to make it better by telling me he had never been able to finish to me.”