Thought Catalog

39 People Confess The Sluttiest Thing They’ve Ever Done

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Flickr / Illustration by Daniella Urdinlaiz.
Flickr / Illustration by Daniella Urdinlaiz.
Found on AskReddit.

1. I chugged rum from a horse dildo while many people watched.

“That’s kinda hard when you are in kink. But I like this time when I was at a party and was on my knees chugging RumChata from a horse dildo while many people watched. It was pretty good.”


2. I flashed my pussy at a bar full of people and let them take pics.

“Flashed my pussy at a bar full of people and let them take pics.”


3. I went to church without underwear on.

“I went to church without underwear on.”


4. In junior high, I let a guy suck me off for Magic The Gathering Cards.

“In junior high, I let a guy suck me off for Magic The Gathering Cards.”


5. I fucked a couple different guys in the handicapped Port-A-Potty next to my high school’s tennis court.

“Fucked a couple different guys in the handicapped Port-A-Potty next to my high school’s tennis court. I was a disgustingly easy 14-year-old.”


6. I fooled around with a circus carnie on a Greyhound bus.

“Back in college I fooled around with a circus carnie on a Greyhound bus. Didn’t care one bit.”


7. I got a blowjob from a Jehovah’s Witness outside under a tree in the middle of a hurricane.

“I received a blowjob from an ex-girlfriend who had become a devout Jehovah Witness outside under a tree in the middle of a hurricane.”


8. I let seven guys fuck me while I sucked my boyfriend’s cock.

“While sucking my boyfriend’s cock, I let anyone who wanted to fuck me do it (with my own condoms), top tally was 7. It was also my birthday. I never saw any of their faces, only felt their cock in me. We also had sex with a chick while her BF watched. Annnnddd it happened yesterday. Literally.”


9. I was spit-roasted by two guys whom I had never met before.

“I lost my virginity in a threesome in which I was spit-roasted by two guys whom I had never met before.”


10. One day, one bathhouse, over twenty dudes.

“I’ve often been known to visit gay saunas in London. I tend to try and get my money’s worth and stay for a whole day. I’ve already lost count of the number of guys I’ve been ‘intimate’ with throughout my life, but on one day at a bathhouse I lost count during just that visit. It was over 20 dudes.”


11. I gave ten hand jobs in under 24 hours…to myself.

“I gave like 10 hand jobs in under 24 hours. Granted, they were all to myself.”


12. I taught a preacher’s daughter how to masturbate.

“It’s hard to be slutty as a virgin, but I taught a preacher’s daughter how to masturbate and just corrupted her in general.

She’s a sweet innocent girl until she sends you bestiality.”


13. I fucked my ex, her best friend, and one of my friends all at the same time.

“I fucked my ex, her best friend, and one of my friends all at the same time. That was exhausting.”


14. I got a blowjob on a long school bus trip and got thrown out of Catholic school because of it.

“Got kicked out of my 8th grade Catholic school for getting a blowjob on a long school bus trip.”


15. I fisted her in the kitchen, fucked her in the bedroom, then pissed on her in the shower.

“Ex wife and I tried to reconcile. Didn’t work out. Sex would turn in to some rather rough and nasty stuff (she loved getting fisted, and I would happily oblige).

One night, I show up at her place. Proceed to fist her in the kitchen. Then fuck her in the bedroom. Then I pissed on her in the shower.

Then she told me she wanted to fuck my cousin. So I called him up. Unbeknownst to me, he brought his roommate along as well.

Started off with cousin’s roomie eating her out. Little did he know I creampied her about 2 hours earlier. Then my cousin entered the room and got a decent blowjob (something she would never do when we were married). Then I got in on the action. We would swap positions about every 20 or so minutes—whoever was fucking her got his dick sucked. Made her the dirty little whore I knew she always was.

Culminated in making her airtight for about 15 or so minutes. I was balls-deep in her ass, cousin was pounding the ever-living hell out of her pussy and his roomie was face-fucking her. I pulled out before I blew my load and blasted her face. Then my cousin blasted her face and tits. Finally, his roomie creampied her.

Don’t miss that bitch one bit. If memory serves, that was the last night I railed her.”


16. I fucked in the bathroom of a dive bar. On the floor. Ew.

1. Fucked in a stairwell in the Sutter/Stockton parking garage.
2. Had a gang bang in a porn theater in Oakland.
3. Had a threesome with a guy I knew in high school and one of his work buddies.
4. Chatted with a stranger online and met for sex within the hour.
5. Fucked in the bathroom of a dive bar. On the floor. Ew.”


17. I literally face-fucked my husband-to-be because he’s an idiot.

“So. Let me begin with saying I have a very high sex drive, my fiancé not so much. I’m bored horny and have a day off work. I decide to get myself near climax 6 times so I’m thoroughly riled up for my partner to come home. I tried on 6 different outfits trying to show off my ass then I begin thinking of scenario after scenario on how to turn him on. He finally arrives home and is so aloof to how over the top horny I am and begins to browse on his fucking phone! So me being like ‘AW HELL NAW’ I tear off my clothes fuck my dick in his face and say you better be in the mood after the amount of work I’ve done. TL;DR – Literally face-fucked my husband-to-be because he’s an idiot.”


18. Motel Tinder Viagra blowout.

“Booked a hotel to have sex with a Tinder girl, banged her, but she had to leave to go back home before her parents became suspicious. Then proceeded to take a Viagra and bang 3 hookers staying at the hotel over the course of the next few hours. Went outside to have a smoke and there were some girls smoking weed there. I told them to try out my vaporizer and we ended up smoking together and chilling in my room. One passed out on the other bed so then I was trying to hook up with the other one but my dick just didn’t work. At that point I’d ejaculated 6 times in the previous 8 or so hours and I just couldn’t get it up. She wasn’t particularly attractive either, so that didn’t help.”


19. I blew someone in the back of the cab while the driver was probably watching.

“I gave someone a blowjob in the back of a cab. Pretty sure the driver could see. I cringe every time I think about it.”


20. I would bang my male roommate even though I was this super-Christian.

“Years ago, when I was young, I had a pretty hot male roommate. Sometimes he’d come in my room and ask if we could have sex since ‘It had been a while’ for him. So even though I was supposed to be this super-Christian student, I would say yes. And to this day I have never regretted it! Those are some of my favorite memories! Lol.”


21. I was hit by the most godawful stench I’ve ever smelled coming out of another human being.

“While in college, I got to know lots of the town folk—townies—because my first roommate in the dorms was from there. Through them I eventually met Inga, an older gal, maybe 40, who hung out at the same bar as the rest of us.

After many drinks one night as I passed her in the hallway leading to the bathrooms, and in spite of the fact that she was there with some guy, I laid a really big kiss on her. And she kissed me back. The rest of the night there were sparks between us, but she was with that guy, so I tried to be cool about it, and nothing happened, but I definitely wanted to hammer that middle-aged pussy.

Now, mind you, Inga is no great beauty, and was generally rough around the edges. She was on the heavy side, but not fat per se, and she spent a lot of her evenings some degree of drunk.

A few years go by and I’m sitting at home alone, and who should stop by but Inga. Inga’s got a buzz on, and she sits next to me on the couch. We smoke some trees and she weirdly reaches over and starts to stroke me between my eyes, like a kitty, she says. So I laid another big kiss on her and the next thing I know, we’re both naked in my room. Now, she doesn’t look great naked, but not bad, either, and I’m making out with her and sucking those titties, and ready to do the deed when she tells me she’s sworn off sex and just wants me to jerk off on to her clit, which she is vigorously rubbing. So, always a gentleman, I comply, and I jerk it and jerk it until I’m ready to climax and I get myself into position and I’m so overcome by the moment, I slide my hardness into her delightful wetness.

And it feels AMAZING! Like nothing I’ve ever felt before, tight and warm and wet. Really, it makes me want to try that again, jerk it to the point of climax and then put it in. I came hard, and she liked it, she moaned loudly and grabbed my hips pulling me into her. It was so fucking hot.

Until I pulled it out. When I did I was hit by the most godawful stench I’ve ever smelled coming out of another human being. Seriously, like I’d been fucking a bucket of swamp muck from Mordor. I almost puked and ran to the bathroom and washed my dick about ten times. Couldn’t believe it. She left soon after. I more recently was part of a conversation where two friends were talking about how choosy they were about who they would sleep with, how the girls needed to be hot, etc. Thinking of Inga I said, I’ve never been that picky, just regretful.”


22. I fucked a woman in a train station toilet after approx. 3 minutes of conversation.

“Fucked a woman in a train station toilet after approx. 3 minutes of conversation. No names, no numbers. And I mean fucked, not just intercourse. It was raw, it was energetic, it was…rude. Hair pulling, name-calling, demanding, angry sex. I suspect she was satisfying some kind of stranger fetish and I happened to be the stranger she met. I had bruises and other minor ailments it was that physical (and awkward given it was in a train station toilet) likely she did too. It was slutty and it was god damn glorious.”


23. I had sex with three women in under twenty-four hours.

“I woke up next to the girl I was seeing and we had sex. I went back to my apartment and showered, then met my ex-girlfriend for lunch. After lunch I went back to her apartment to get some of the things I’d left behind. We wound up having sex. Then I went back to my apartment and showered. Then I went to a party. I met a girl and we hit it off. She took me back to her apartment and we had sex. I didn’t really put together the fact that I’d had sex with three women in under twenty-four hours until the next morning, when I was taking the subway back to my apartment.”


24. Maybe not slutty, but impressive nonetheless.

I’m not sure if this is slutty, but I once fucked my girlfriend nine times in a day…”


25. I came in a vagina and an asshole belonging to two different women in the span of like 20 minutes.

“At a big summer party where everyone brought tents, I brought a girl to my tent, had sex with her, came in her ass, then walked out for a smoke. Started chatting with a girl who was also out for a smoke. We walked down the beach and I railed her brains out and came I her. Came in a vagina and an asshole belonging to two different women in the span of like 20 minutes….

The second girl had a boyfriend sleeping in their tent, and after I fucked her with my poop dick she went and cuddled up to him! Suk it haterz.”


26. Me, my cousin, and a friend once had sex with two trailer park stepsisters.

“Me, my cousin, and a friend once had sex with two trailer park stepsisters. All I remember is the older sister running out the room crying halfway into it because she felt guilty about cheating on her bf. Five minutes later she was back on the bed getting fucked.”


27. Four months of sex, never learned her last name.

“I had a sex-only relationship with a woman for 4 months. I never found out her last name.”


28. Four guys, one day.

“Slept with 4 guys in the same day. 2 or 3 guys on dozens of other days. Slept with 3 brothers. And 2 cousins. Had dozens of threesomes with identical twins. Have had sex in tons of public places. Slept with 31 men, I’m only 21.”


29. I sometimes fuck random people just so I’ll have someone to eat all the baked goods I make.

“I sometimes fuck random people just so I’ll have someone to eat all the baked goods I make. (I live alone so they’d only go to waste when I don’t eat them).”


30. I fucked my ex on a train.

“I fucked my ex on a train from Halifax to Leeds, I came when we were in Bradford I think.”


31. I banged every biology partner I’d ever had.

“I slept with my biology partner the day before our final lesson just so I could make sure I’d banged every biology partner I’d ever had. Never saw her or spoke to her again.”


32. Slutty and sad.

“When I was ready to get over a long-term relationship through lots of anonymous sex, I used Tinder to help me out. I had been talking to this guy for a few weeks and really getting along well with him, so I agreed to meet up. He reeked like cigarettes and was sweaty and nervous. I did it anyway because, whatever, I was there.

I was disappointed in that encounter so I agreed to meet up with another guy who I had been talking to. I drove over an hour away for a second sex date in the same night. We did it for a very short amount of time, and then he got a phone call that his grandpa had died and couldn’t get his dick up for the rest of the night.

Both sluttiest and saddest.”


33. A neck full of hickeys.

“Was involved in a hickey-giving competition one drunken night at a party. No sex was had (at least on my part). But goddamn, the shame I felt walking into work the next day with all these hickeys covering my neck was real.”


34. 4 men at once.

“4 men at once.”


35. I called in sick the next day because I couldn’t walk right.

“I’m convinced every girl has a slutty period. You’ve just gotta get it out of your system.

In mine I went on a date with a guy to a drive-in. He took me back to his place we ate ice cream and had sex. It was early when I left and another guy I was talking to asked if I wanted to chill.

Went home took a shower and he came over, we ended up having sex.

He left, I took a shower and my FWB knocked on my door. We cuddled on my couch and ended up having sex.

I was talking also texting this other guy, who, unbeknownst to me had a huge fetish for sharing. I was telling him how I’d been super-slutty that day and he begged me to tell him when my FWB left. And if I’d leave my front door unlocked and he’d come over and let himself in.

I fell asleep before he got there and he wakes me up and asks if he can please eat me out. Boy has a magical tongue and ended up making me cum so hard I passed out. Then I had the best sex of my life and called in sick the next day because I couldn’t walk right.”


36. Sex for pizza.

Sex for money, sex for drugs, sex for pizza, sex w 4 guys in one day, met a guy off craigslist and drove an hour to the city and met him in a dark parking lot and didn’t even know what he looked like, I’m lucky to be alive. I’ve definitely calmed down and am in a wonderful relationship.


37. Partied like it was 1999.

“1999 New Year’s Lake Tahoe during the riot there. Night one got a legal blowjob at the Kitty Cat Ranch in Carson City. Night two took out my contacts after much drinking. Sleeping on the floor. Randomly girl asks me if I want sleep in a bed I say yes. No idea what she looks like. One thing leads to another. Blowjob sex finite. All while friends are ‘sleeping’ in the other queen bed. Night three make out with this okay looking girl. Go to the bathroom whip it out she sucks it. I jerk off on her face. That was the trifecta weekend of my slutdom.”


38. Got a blowjob from my GF and my best female friend at the same time.

“Got a blowjob from my GF and my best female friend at the same time while ungodly baked. I was too stoned to know what was happening and they stopped before it got really good.”


39. I walked out to the kitchen, naked, to the sounds of screaming and yelling from both parties in the other room.

“So I met a girl, we hit it off. Saw each other off and on for a couple of weeks before I walked in on my best friend/roommate/ex-boyfriend having sex with her on my bed. They never noticed. A few weeks later she started dating him after I wouldn’t have sex with her. Couldn’t get the image out of my head.

Well, fast forward to me about to move out, me and my roommate got drunk together and were playing killing floor. One thing led to another and I was blowing him under the table. Ended up going back into his room and proceed to toss our 400 combined pounds about in a sexy manner.

Then, it struck me…The next day his new girlfriend came over while he was at work. One thing led to another, and we had sex on his bed. He caught us in the act and proceeded to lose his shit on her, not me. It was obvious he was driving her into the dirt with his words, so I spoke up. ‘Dude, you have no right to be pissed. You fucked me last night while you were drunk. Get off your high horse.’ From there, I walked out to the kitchen, naked, to the sounds of screaming and yelling from both parties in the other room. I cracked a beer, smiled, and sat in the next room as they broke up on the spot.

I still masturbate to this some 4 years later.” TC mark

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    • http://allensrepositoryofstuff.wordpress.com allensrepositoryofstuff

      Some of these are OK, but I wonder how many of them are complete BS and how many are truthful.

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