9 Sleazy Real-Life Sex Scenes From The Hospital Ward

Found on AskReddit.

1. She is bent over taking it in the ass while her three-year-old son is standing outside the bathroom watching

“I am a nursing assistant. A young female patient had asked to take a shower so I got her all set up and told her to call me when she was done because I needed to make sure she got reattached to her IV. Well, it’s been about an hour and I still haven’t heard her call, so I knock on her door and get no reply. I freak out thinking she’s in trouble and enter….I walk in to see that her husband is in the shower with her. She is bent over taking it in the ass while her three-year-old son is standing outside the bathroom watching.”

2. He starts masturbating right in front of me

“Okay, I’m a student nurse. I have a job as a nurse assistant where I sometimes have to spend the entire shift looking after a patient, one on one. This is often due to behavioral problems. So this one day I’m looking after a one-on-one patient, and he’s wanting to go to the toilet. His mobility isn’t great, but with my help we get there. There we are, standing in front of the toilet (me behind him, just supporting him a little in case he loses his balance) when he starts masturbating. Right in front of me. I quickly whispered “[patient’s name], are you masturbating?” His response: “…yeah….” I had to give him a stern explanation that that kind of behavior is not appropriate in front of other people. Sigh.”

3. Physician fellatio

“A doctor I know sucked another doctor’s dick at a wine and cheese. They were caught and it was a big deal.”

4. Chronic masturbator

“Had a homeless man who was in a manic state admitted to my unit. He was a 1:1 (one-on-one observation), which meant someone was in the room with him at all times for safety. He would masturbate under the covers while being explicit to the sitters (mostly all women). It got to the point where we only put men in there with him, but we would still have to relieve them for breaks. We sat further than we were supposed to, but you could tell what he was doing. The last time I sat there, he told me he liked to pee on himself and that he hopes I did too because it’s warm.”

5. Psych patient soirée

“I did a rotation on a psychiatric unit. Two patients were admitted with schizophrenia and acute psychosis (related to drugs, I believe). The male patient requested to visit another unit, and policy allows this if there are activities available, and if they have good behavior. When the male patient saw a female patient he was interested in, he walked over to her. I believe they said two or three words to each other. Immediately, they both ripped off their clothes as quickly as possible and tried to ‘get to it.’ They had to break them up, unfortunately. For once, I felt like the bad guy.”

6. If you are an old man, move into a retirement home!

“I worked as a nurse in a retirement home and one morning at like 7am as I made my way to a resident’s room and turned I to what I thought was an empty hallway I heard some giggling and moaning. At the end of the hall there was a small hidden corner that can only be seen into once you are very close to it. I turned into the corner there was an elderly man standing and facing me, and in front of him seated in a walker and facing away was an old lady giving him a blowjob. I’m telling you people if you are an old man, move into a retirement home! They get so much action and the old ladies will fight over the men since there are so few of them. Sexual acts were walked into often by caregivers.”

7. A married couple asked for our “assistance”

“God, you really don’t want to know. But we had a couple who got married. They asked if we could assist. Too bad he couldn’t get it up and Medicaid won’t pay for ED meds.”

8. Patients masturbated as I tried examining them

“I’ve seen patients masturbate right as you tried to examine them. That’s dedication.”

9. Blowjob with a catheter

“I’m a tech, not a nurse or physician, but I was working the pulmonary floor at my last hospital a few years ago when a call light went off. I responded, but it wasn’t an intentional call light. The patient had hit the call button in the throes of passion. I walked in to his wife giving him a blowjob. It wouldn’t have really been a big deal, other than sex in a hospital is just begging to get some really fucked-up infections. However, this patient had a Foley catheter inserted, and the wife was working around it. I almost vomited.” Thought Catalog Logo Mark

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