Exploited trust. When someone trusts enough to share who they are, who they have been…what matters to them deeply…that sort of thing, and another person betrays them by using that knowledge to hurt or take advantage of them; that’s the worst.
Being cheated on…
when RESPECT flies out the window…
Using another solely to manipulate events in your favor.
Being cruel for the sake of being cruel.
I don’t believe in forgiveness. If you’ve done something minor, you don’t need to be forgiven, so I don’t forgive. If you’ve done something major, I’m just going to hold it against you for the rest of your life. Honestly, though, if you don’t want to forgive me for that, I don’t care.
I don’t necessarily forgive. I just move on. If it’s a big enough offense, you are out of my life. I won’t see, listen, or speak to you. This is a rare thing for me and has only happened on a few occasions. One was my first boyfriend; I kicked him to the curb for being a lying, inconsistent jerk. I kicked another friend to the curb because he tried to manipulate me and turn me against my husband-to-be.
Unforgiveable and bootable offenses
– Consistent lying and not petty white lies
– Violence (not into it and don’t want it in my life)
– Racist speech (I do not tolerate racism or other forms hate such as that)
– Sexual Harassment
– Specific Abusive Behavior
– Animal Abuse/Cruelty
I can forgive, but not forget…at the end I always try to understand the reason behind it and move on. In most instances, I completely cut the relationship in every sense of the way. Depending on the person, I may plan a silent revenge… nothing illegal, just a way for payback in a legal way…not physically either.
Things that will impact anger if the person crosses my path even after I have forgiven them would be:
– Physical, Emotional, and Mental abuse whether it is to my kids or myself or someone else
– Lack of respect for those close to me (i.e, my kids, my parents, my sister, brother, or any family member that I care for)
– Lack of respect for others, specially elderly people
– Lack of respect for values I deeply care about
– Animal Abuse
– Murder of a family member or close individual in my life
Although I can forgive the individual for doing the above, I cannot see his face ever again because the anger will still be there. And there has being only ONE person in my life that reached that level…it tends to accumulate for years before I explode in such a way.
The bottom line is that I can easily forgive someone, but I will never ever forget all the pain the person has caused for me or those close to me. I do not relive the pain, but I use it as a way to pave my life in a way that the above is never repeated.
I do not live in the past…I plan for the future using past experiences, but I live day-by-day without worrying about the past or the future, because neither one is at my reach. One cannot be changed, the other is uncertain….
For me personally, I’d say that breaking my trust in such a way that it would be impossible for me to overlook them would be an “unforgivable”…but what I usually end up doing is just ending it and never communicating with them again.
Lying, cheating, or betraying trust. I’ve gotten into serious fistfights due to these things. I have not one shred of compassion for anyone who does these things to me. They should’ve thought of the implications of their actions ahead of time.
As for me, no forgiveness. Once I deem someone a hazardous person I cut them out of my life forever. I am not risking my life and the lives of those around me just to please and make 1 person feel better. I’ll take little things since I don’t really care unless they pile up; no one is perfect. It would be pointless though to go into specifics about how I view things since its complex and part of what I believe.
consistent manipulation, abuse, dismissiveness or neglect, greed, close-mindedness. i can forgive impulses resulting in such, but if the person presents a pattern, i will distance myself.
when someone is physically abusive, if he/she hits you once…he will do it again. i found out the hard way, thinking if i loved him, he would change…ended up nearly dead. thank god i got out of that one!
Threatening my life independent of the relationship (like, say, accusing me of a crime).
2. Making important decisions without her
3. Bringing down legal trouble on the two of you
5. Forgetting something important