13 Suprisingly Witty Quotes From Pornstars

Shutterstock / Danomyte
Shutterstock / Danomyte


I’d like to see Richard Burton or Sir John Gielgud or Sir Laurence Olivier do “Macbeth”, memorizing all that dialogue, and have a boner.
—Ron Jeremy


People say, “Are you just acting?” Well, you can’t act when you’ve got a fist up your butt.
—Marilyn Chambers


Now I work with women who are younger than my breast implants.
—Nina Hartley


I think some people recognize my butthole before they recognize my face.
—Bobbi Starr


You can’t just say to your girlfriend, “I have to go fuck 500 girls in Eastern Europe. Wait for me here, please.”
—Erik Everhard


Making eye contact during rough sex is roughly the equivalent to trying to read Dostoyevsky on a rollercoaster.
—Jenna Jameson


Don’t have oral sex with a woman if her vagina smells like a dumpster; that’s how I lost both my arms.
—Peter North


Be good or don’t get caught.
—Traci Lords


You cannot blame porn….When I was young, I used to masturbate to Gilligan’s Island.
—Ron Jeremy


Ugly people shouldn’t be able to handle food.
—Kami Andrews


People who substitute soda for water disgust me. But I swallow jizz for a living so who cares?
—Asa Akira


If you think pubic hair on a woman is unnatural or weird, you aren’t mature enough to be touching vaginas.


All the dick sucking from the past few days is not making this morning’s karaoke session very easy.
—Asa Akira
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