13 Suprisingly Witty Quotes From Pornstars

Shutterstock / Danomyte
Shutterstock / Danomyte

1.

I’d like to see Richard Burton or Sir John Gielgud or Sir Laurence Olivier do “Macbeth”, memorizing all that dialogue, and have a boner.
—Ron Jeremy

2.

People say, “Are you just acting?” Well, you can’t act when you’ve got a fist up your butt.
—Marilyn Chambers

3.

Now I work with women who are younger than my breast implants.
—Nina Hartley

4.

I think some people recognize my butthole before they recognize my face.
—Bobbi Starr

5.

You can’t just say to your girlfriend, “I have to go fuck 500 girls in Eastern Europe. Wait for me here, please.”
—Erik Everhard

6.

Making eye contact during rough sex is roughly the equivalent to trying to read Dostoyevsky on a rollercoaster.
—Jenna Jameson

7.

Don’t have oral sex with a woman if her vagina smells like a dumpster; that’s how I lost both my arms.
—Peter North

8.

Be good or don’t get caught.
—Traci Lords

9.

You cannot blame porn….When I was young, I used to masturbate to Gilligan’s Island.
—Ron Jeremy

10.

Ugly people shouldn’t be able to handle food.
—Kami Andrews

11.

People who substitute soda for water disgust me. But I swallow jizz for a living so who cares?
—Asa Akira

12.

If you think pubic hair on a woman is unnatural or weird, you aren’t mature enough to be touching vaginas.
—Stoya

13.

All the dick sucking from the past few days is not making this morning’s karaoke session very easy.
—Asa Akira
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