21 Girls On The Dumb Things Guys Do During Sex (NSFW)

via Francesca Brom
via Francesca Brom
Found on AskReddit.

1. No foreplay.

Just going in for the kill. Guys, seriously, we’re like ovens, we take time to warm up y’know?

2. Bad, open-mouth, hard kissing with the tongue flailing like a speared and desperate fish.

Bad, open-mouth, hard kissing with the tongue flailing like a speared and desperate fish.

Way too much slobber.

3. Stating, “You like that, huh?”

Stating, “You like that, huh?”, over and over again, it’s just creepy….

4. Cumming in my mouth without asking.

Don’t assume you can just cum in anyone’s mouth. Ask first.

5. Being completely quiet.

Being completely quiet. I mean, I LIKE TO HEAR YOU MOAN JUST LIKE YOU ENJOY HEARING ME.

6. Pressuring me to orgasm.

Pressuring you to orgasm. Sometimes it’s not going to happen but I still like having sex because it feels good even without the climax. What definitely doesn’t feel good is having a pair of eyes on you waiting for you to come.

7. Smelling bad.

Smell bad / be unhygienic.

And spraying on a ton of body spray does not mean you have exited those realms. Shower yourself. You wouldn’t want something nasty in your mouth, and neither do we.

8. Calling me a whore, slut, cunt, bitch, etc.

Calling me a whore, slut, cunt, bitch, etc. during sex and then get pissed when I get pissed off about being demeaned.

Seriously, no filthy names unless you know for sure she likes that.

9. Spitting on my ass before anal.

Spitting on my ass before anal. There, I said it.

10. Sticking it in my ass without lube.

Sticking it in the pooper without lube.

11. Falling asleep while I’m blowing him.

Falling asleep mid dick-sucking. That was awkward.

12. Blaming me when I don’t cum.

“Well, this technique always works, so something must be wrong with you.”

13. Not cumming and blaming it on me.

Last too long and say “you can’t make me cum.” Like it’s a challenge. I dated a guy who did this all the time would last forever and go on and on about how I couldn’t make him cum. Biggest turn off, not only do our Lady bits get sore after that long, but no one wants to be told they can’t get their partner off, it’s not sexy, it’s disappointing and make us feel bad about ourselves.

14. Forgetting to trim their fingernails.

Kind of a pre-sex thing, but forgetting to trim/file fingernails. Vaginal pain/bleeding can ruin the mood REALLY fast.

15. Violently stabbing my vaginal cavity with his fingers.

Stop violently stabbing my vaginal cavity with your fingers. Contrary to popular belief, there is not a tiny fencer looking to duel you in there.

16. That circle thing.

That circle thing, where you move your penis in a circle while inside her instead of in and out. It does not feel good when you’re wildly jerking your junk around like you’re trying to do the helicopter inside my vagina. Stop.

17. Trying to repeat stuff he’s seen in porn.

One time this guy was giving me oral, and he stops, and then repeatedly slaps my yoni. I was very confused and had to ask him what the fuck he was doing. Apparently he saw it in porn.

So yeah, the worst thing a guy can do during sex is repeat stuff he’s seen in porn.

18. These are the five biggest issues I’ve had with guys in the past.

Based on my past experience, the worst things you can do are as follows:

1) Not making any noise. It’s just creepy to me. You don’t have to be porn star level loud. Some women (like me) prefer more noise than others, but I don’t know any women who prefer completely quiet men.

2) Ask me every time you want to change positions. It kills the mood and just makes things logistically awkward. If you want to change positions, either say something sexy to encourage it, or just move to make it happen. Don’t just stop and go, “So do you want to like, be on top now, or…?”

3) Not changing your rhythm. Don’t just go in and out at the same pace until you cum. Go shallow, then go deep. Go fast, then go painfully slow. Go hard, and then go gentle. Make it exciting. UNLESS SHE’S ABOUT TO CUM. Then just keep doing what you’re doing and don’t change a thing.

4) Making foreplay just a precursor to sex. This one is kind of weird, but to me, I think of foreplay as a separate sex act. I’m not just doing it to make my partner horny. I’m doing it because I want to explore their body, find out what they like, and make them feel good. I could do foreplay for a fairly long time before sex because I don’t think of it as the road to sex. For example, oral. I don’t think of oral as “getting him ready for sex.” It’s just oral. It’s a separate sex act. Plus, I promise, sex is way hotter when you’ve been building up to it for an hour or two (or hell, even thirty minutes if you get bored fast) than if you just fuck around long enough to get horny and then stick it in.

5) I’m gonna edit to add this one because I forgot how much I hated this with my ex. On a broader scale, making sex the exact same every time sucks. Switch up the situation a little bit. Go with a different room, or spend all day teasing first, or be rough one night and gentle the next. Part of what kills sex in relationships is boredom. Hell, every once in awhile, just come home and immediately pounce on her. Show her you’ve been thinking about her all day. Just mix things up and don’t get in the habit of doing it at the same time every night with the same foreplay.

These are the five biggest issues I’ve had with guys in the past. Everything else basically comes down to learning what your partner wants.

19. Accidentally stabbing me in the eye with his erect dick.

Dance around all sexy like prior to the deed and accidentally stab you in the eye with his erect dick.

20. Slamming his dick into the area between my hoo-hah and asshole.

Pulls out to far and slams his dick into the area between your hoo-hah and asshole. Goddamn that hurts the lady gooch.

21. Baby talk.

Worst things:

• No foreplay (just going for it as soon as you’re ready not when we’re both ready)

• Baby talk… just creepy unless its a specifically expressed fetish.

Speaking of specifically expressed fetishes:

• Don’t choke someone unless you know they’re into it. (Side Tip: don’t choke someone if you’re drunk, your hands are surprisingly strong on our little necks, easy to underestimate the amount of pressure)

• Don’t go for anal without asking, and for the love of god please have a fuck ton of lube.

• Lastly the absolute worst thing you can do is super deep-throat a girl without asking and then get all pissy when she pukes all over your bed. TC mark

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