13 Harrowing Tales Of Meth Abuse

6. Afraid of Dust

by Mindless from Erowid (ExpID 5561)

I had just shot up right before I left my house, so everything was great. I was smoking a cigarette and I went to throw it out of my sunroof. About five minutes later a whole bunch of ashes fall on me (it turned out the cigarette didn’t go anywhere, it got stuck between the sunroof and the inside of the car). It was then that I lost it. I felt the ashes land on my arm and I immediately freaked out. I cant really explain what I felt – it was just fear. I pulled over and began wiping myself off, and I felt the strong need to wipe every piece of dust off the dashboard of my car. I had to have everything spotless – I felt afraid of dust and afraid of ashes and afraid of everything.

I picked up my friend and I didn’t tell him what happened. I was too embarrassed and I just wanted to let it go and forget about it. A few hours later after I dropped him off I was parked in my car freaking out. I saw things coming out of my skin and I couldn’t get them to go away. I saw things coming out of the seat of my car – it was almost like every surface had pours and they were all exploding and threatening me. I was so scared! I didn’t know what to do. I saw little black specs coming through my skin. I sat there and squeezed and picked and tried so hard to get them out but they just kept coming back. Every particle of dust that I saw (and I saw a lot) frightened the hell out of me. I would jump and almost scream whenever I saw any.

I never want to feel that way again.

* * * * * * * * * * * * *

7. An Angel Fallen From Grace

by Tabris from Erowid (ExpID 18874)

Once I hit the 36th hour, I started to hallucinate. I was sitting at my cubicle and my arms looked 10 feet long. The world was spinning, everything was distorted. My heart was racing and I have a heart condition…I was worried that my heart would explode…. now I believe that methamphetamine is evil in of itself. PURE evil. It’s taken me through the worst of hells the past days, and I thank whatever god there may be that I saw that before I got in any more. As it is, I’m still waiting for my cognitive functions to return to normal. I find myself horribly frustrated because I can’t construct a sentence without thinking about it first. I have all these ideas and I get horribly frustrated trying to communicate them. It’s getting better right now, but I’ve only done meth 3 times.

I never believed in evil before I came across this, but I just can’t put it any other way. Meth nearly swallowed my soul. I looked the devil in the eye and spat in his face.

* * * * * * * * * * * * *

More From Thought Catalog