5 Things To Really Think About Before You Become Anyone’s Mistress


I was 18, young, and REALLY stupid. I made the irreversible mistake of dating my boss, who also happened to be twice my age, and married. Before the judgment settles in, think about when YOU were 18; uh huh! That’s what I thought. Here are some things to consider before stepping into a relationship with a married man:

1. Protection

This one seems easy, yet so many people fall into the trap of thinking they’re safe just because they’re sleeping with someone they feel comfortable with. As someone smart once said, “Hey, you! Don’t be silly. Put a rubber on your willy!” Seriously. If they’re still active with their wife (and they probably are putting their hotdog in her bun), you’re getting the crumbs, babe. WRAP IT UP!

2. Children

This is sticky. If there are children involved, really, REALLY think about what you’re doing. As hot, and sexy as this man may be, he has produced little humans who look up to him. Even if he does leave his wife for you (and they almost never do), the resentment and bitterness those children will have against you could last a lifetime.

3. Once A Cheater, Always A Cheater

If he’s cheating on his wife with you, how can you be sure he won’t do the same to you? How can you be sure he’s not ALREADY doing the same to you? I really do believe people can change for the better, but if you have it in you to cheat once, you have it in you to cheat twice.

4. You

Do you really want to be the woman on the side? Don’t you think you deserve more than just a night or two a week? Being in a secret relationship can be fun, and exciting for all of two minutes. It gets old, fast! Think about what you want in life; if a house surrounded by a white picket fence and children are in your dream, this man is probably not going to be the one to make it come true!

5. The Wife

Lastly, but most importantly, how would you feel if you were this man’s wife? It’s not only humiliating to be cheated on, but so goddamn painful. This woman (more than likely) has devoted her life to keeping her vows, and this man is essentially shitting on them. Put yourself in her shoes. Are they uncomfortable? Probably.

The heart wants what it wants, I know! When it comes to men already in relationships, it’s best to stay away. This isn’t just for women; men are to blame too. After all, it takes two to tango. Oftentimes, after the men get caught, they’re given a second chance or they get divorced but rarely do they ever keep the mistress around. I’m not making a sweeping generalization; I know, #NotAllMen, etc. But the reality is, being a mistress is just not as glamorous as shows and movies make it out to be. Do the right thing. Find a free man. Be safe, and find extraordinary love. Thought Catalog Logo Mark

Liza is a writer and blogger.

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