I Like To Leave Because I Don’t Quite Know How To Stay

I am not one to stay in a certain place for too long
I have a residence, but it is another bill every month,
it is not a home

I am always on the next flight out
to anywhere
because I am so over trying to build a singular life
that I make airports my home and hotels my resting space
creating lives for myself wherever I may land

there’s comfort in knowing that in a few days or a few weeks,
I’ll be on the next plane, train, bus
or my eye will be caught by something that glitters just as
much as the gold before it

there’s some comfort in knowing that
no one really knows anything about me,
and they won’t ever really have a chance to
because I won’t be around for long
but I will always return at some point in life,
and pick up where things left off.

And maybe this comfort is brought on by the fact that
it’s easier to let people go than it is to let
people close
it is easier to mend a broken heart
than it is to let someone else help repair the
broken pieces.
it’s easier to be independent than
it is to find dependence

I like the idea of a see you again
rather than a forever goodbye
because if I don’t stay long enough,
I will never have to endure the emotions of a goodbye

so I like to make an exit because I’m not quite sure how to build a home and
I like to leave because I was never taught how to stay