10. Pregnant And In Jail
At 19 years old, I was pregnant for the first time and didn’t know who the father was because I spent several months of my life living like a vagrant and constantly on drugs. I woke up many times in strange places, with no idea how I got there. Usually, it was the after party, after the after party. I traveled between several cities and didn’t really know anyone that I was with. I spent my first trimester in jail for theft, where they accused me of lying about even being pregnant because their pregnancy tests were a stream of false negatives. I had std’s, got my shots, was released to my mothers care. I cleaned hotel rooms, drove an ice cream truck, had a permanent garage sale on my mothers front lawn and an endless stream of failed interviews to try to get on my feet.
My brothers and my mother helped me raise my baby, I had some government assistance for the doctor and birth. When he was 3, I joined the military and left him with my mom. When he was 4, I met my soulmate and we moved in with him, then married about a month after my sons 5th birthday. My son is now 13, and his father is my husband. He asks questions, and I answer the best I can. I have always been honest with him and let him know that I am sorry I didn’t know his biological father well enough to have kept in contact with him. He is a well adjusted young man with a heart of gold. We had did a little DNA test for ancestry.com and he is definitely more ethnic than I am and he has loads of cousins matched to him through there. If he ever contacts any of them, I would be curious to see what he learns.
11. Third Time Was The Charm
I hooked up with my son’s dad 3 times and got pregnant on the last time. Only knew him one month. That was 7.5 years ago and I made the best decision by not having an abortion.
His dad fucked off about 6 weeks in and I didn’t get any support from him until my son was about 6 months old. His mom was amazing and still is! She has been my rock and would walk through fire for her grandson. He absolutely adores her. To this day I can count on one hand how many times he’s seen his dad.
He pays so he does the very basic necessities a dad should do. His reason for not being there for our son was that he didn’t choose it. That’s fine. I got to see every single milestone and make all the decisions. He knows one day he will have to answer his sons questions.
Oh and for what it’s worth, I was 28 and his dad was 27 when I got pregnant. Definitely old enough to know better on both our parts.