I can’t even afford an apartment.
23 and I feel so incredibly far from ready…. can’t imagine when i will be, since I don’t really have any of my shit together :|
I’m 23 and my mom had two kids by my age!! Two!!
I was around 23 when an ex was after kids. 3 years and I’ve changed stance from “not ready yet” to “not happening”.
In that time I’ve seen more than a dozen friends and colleagues have kids, and then rarely ever see them out of work. I’d much rather have money, freedom, quiet, fun and definitely sleep…5am is not a time I need to be awake.
23 here soon to be 24. I was stupid and got married at 18,had a kiddo,then got divorced (he was extremely abusive). I now work 40 hours a week while trying to raise my 4 year old to be a decent human being (So far she’s pretty rad) and I just enrolled in spring classes at a local college that I’ll also be attending full time. It’s stressful as fuck, but I really don’t want to end up being another statistic.
Seriously though, wait until you have most of your shit together to have a kid. It’s really rewarding, but good lord it is extremely physically and emotionally draining.
I am curious about what my own child would look like, but the thought of pregnancy is scary and I would just rather adopt a dog or maybe a small lizard. Who knows.
I grew up in a broken home. While my parents loved me, we were in constant financial ruin because they were two people who started a family accidentally and never learned how to actually be parents. And it tore us all apart.
I used to do the grocery shopping for my parents. I wrote up their budget – they never followed it, but I was great at buying exactly the amount needed for groceries. I cleaned. I did the laundry. I raised my younger siblings (I have about a 12 year age gap with them), right up until I moved out when I was 20.
It still doesn’t mean much. I still suck at budgeting. I’m an awful cook. And because I have lived a life where I got no upper advantages, I never, ever want to make another life experience the shit I did.
I can’t imagine putting another life through a Canadian winter without heat like I did. I never want my child to look at me with tears in their eyes because I can’t afford a field trip for them. I can never fathom my child having to settle for less because I can’t send them to get a proper education. I don’t ever want to tell my child they’re a mistake and I don’t love them, because they ruined my life.
I’m never having children.
I got a vasectomy and my wife has an IUD. We are doubling up on our baby prevention methods.
I’m not particularly interested. One, because I don’t think I’d be good at it no matter what. Two, I wouldn’t be able to give my kids what my parents gave me.
Babies are great though. Anyone who wants a break please hand your babies to me for a maximum of 3 hours, or until they poop.
I’ve pretty much decided I don’t want kids. Knowing a lot of people who’ve had them I’ve seen how much time, energy, money, sanity, social life and freedom they take up. They do gain a lot of memories and the cute moments, but it’s not a trade off I see any value in.
That does make it harder being single and trying to find someone rather difficult, as it’s unfair to pursue a romantic relationship with someone who wants kids.
There’s always cats.
Sometimes I think it’d be fun to watch a little human grow and become their own person but then I remember the shit like school plays, parent/teacher meetings and kids parties and I consider ripping my own ovaries out on the spot.
Honestly, I’m dreading it.
I have 3 siblings, so my parents aren’t particularly worried if I don’t have kids since they have 3 other chances to have grandchildren. My husband, on the other hand, is an only child. His parents have been begging us to give them grandchildren since the day we got married. No joke, they want us to have at least 3 kids.
I’m an early millennial (1982) and honestly I think by the time I secure a stable job with real homeowner and retirement possibilities I’ll be too old to have children.
Man, it’s a harsh reality to look at it from the standpoint of “Money or kids?”
College debt is fucking ridiculous.
I’m 28, in a stable marriage, stable job for both of us, and we just bought a house that theoretically could house at least 2 children but I don’t see it happening. He isn’t especially fond of how noisy and demanding children are, as well as the sass and destruction. I love spending time with my friends’ kids and I think I would enjoy having kids of my own, but I like sleep. I like travel. I like being able to do what I want when I want it.
So I think that hubs and I (he’s ’85 and I’m ’88) are just going to go no kids. Our parents will just have to fuckin’ deal.
Daycare for ONE kid will cost 47% of my take-home pay. Okay, it’s 21% of my husband’s and my take-home pay, which is a more meaningful number. My work has no maternity-leave policy for someone in my position so I hope I don’t end up going without pay until the kid is old enough to send to daycare.
Really looking forwards to having a lil dude and teach him everything a young lil dude should know.
I guess technically I’m a millennial, but I was born in the 80s and I’m 30. I have one and another on the way. It sucks now financially, but I’m glad I did it now, versus 10 years from now. By the time my kids are in school, I’ll be in my mid-30s and out from under the daycare costs. Life will be much easier. It’s just a trade-off now. Once they graduate and leave, I’ll still be young enough to have a little bit of my life back.
I guess I should also clarify how we did this ECONOMICALLY. I have been working about 50-60 hours per week since I was 18 years old. I also worked full time during college to graduate debt-free. My husband has been working largely the same and we both have demanding careers. I realize that I’m a complete weirdo and in the minority, but I have no idea how any of this would have worked out if I hadn’t done all that. I don’t know how people with student loan debt move forward after school…
Here is my plan: Buy out a few orphanage, then raise all of the children in it from a young age as diplomats and politicians, then send them out into the world, and control from behind the scenes. The children will always be loyal to father. You will see.