3. Senior Year Proposal
I was proposed to by my first boyfriend, back in senior year of high school. God, was it embarrassing! And I feel like an ass for saying that. We’d known each other since middle school and had been dating for about 6 months. We’d initially bonded over our mutual hate of our crappy high school and the fact that we were both aspiring artists.
To be honest, I’m not sure where I saw our relationship going or why I didn’t discuss it with him outright. I’d always had a dream of going to a top college and when I miraculously got accepted to a great school on the east coast with a full scholarship, I guess I just assumed our relationship would dissipate over the summer.
Welp, picture me surprised when he spontaneously decided to have an art showing at his house, of some new painting he wanted to unveil for everyone. This was kind of weird since we frequently had parties with our artist friends but didn’t do “unveilings”. Anyway I get to the party and all of our friends are there, including his huge family. His oldest brother had driven in from two cities to be at this shindig so I thought my BF must have been accepted to a gallery or some crazy shit. And color me shocked when the painting was a giant portrait of my face with the words “will you marry me?”.
And he gave the most awkward speech ever about how we were meant to be. And JFC but I was just so pissed off in the moment that all I could stutter out were some words about how we were never going to be together after high school and I would be moving away for college and never coming back to our home town, blah blah blah. After a heated exchange he belted out something about my black heart and that was the end of that.
He now paints animal faces for kids at the mall. I only know this because I was home for Christmas break and saw him there. I still feel like a POS for the way I rejected him, but not for rejecting him.
4. If A Woman Says She Doesn’t Want To Get Married, Believe Her
My ex and I were out one night, just hitting the bars as twenty-somethings do. We had been dating for about a year, and I had talked openly about not wanting to ever get married and never wanting children. He never said anything definitive about either subject, but I knew he wanted the whole white picket fence shebang. We talked often about our dreams and aspirations, and since they were so drastically different, I assumed we both knew our relationship couldn’t last and that we should just enjoy each other while we could. Well, after getting pretty damn drunk and goofy that night, he said, with a huge smile on his face, “Do you wanna get married?” Since we were so intoxicated, I thought he was joking. I burst out laughing, eyes closed, head back and everything. When I recovered, he was on one knee with a big ring in a black box. The whole bar is staring at us and I asked him if he was being serious. His eyes teared up a little and he nodded. I shook my head and started to cry, and said no. I was booed out of the bar.
We did go home together that night, and we did have sex, but we both knew it was for the last time and it was very sad, but comforting. The next morning we talked, and he just couldn’t understand that I was serious about not wanting to be married. It was a good break up, no hatred or resentment, but we haven’t talked since. I think it’s just too embarrassing for both of us that there was such a huge miscommunication about our entire relationship.
If a person says they don’t want to get married, don’t propose to them.
5. I Cheated On You, Marry Me
I turned my ex boyfriend down before he got the chance to do the big public proposal in front of his entire family. He drove me into a dark, secluded parking lot and told me that he had talked to my father earlier in the day. He has a huge smile on his face and pulls out a little black ring box. Now, I had dated this little shit for almost four years, and I knew him well. I just had a feeling that there wasn’t a ring in that box. Aaaand I was right. He opened it, gave me a speech about how there would be a ring in that box one day, but first, he had to tell me something. Turns out that he cheated on me and couldn’t actually propose to me at his family’s halloween party until he got that off his chest. He just couldn’t believe that I didn’t want to marry him after that. Anyways, his mother texted me, called me a whore told me to stay away from her son. Lol no problem.