36 Sexually Experienced Women Share The Surprising Sex Wisdom They Wish Someone Had Told Them

beetlejuice

7.

“For a lot of people sex is very emotional. If that’s the case for you, you just need to be careful about how far you go and with whom.

And you need to be aware of that with your partners, too. While you aren’t entirely responsible for someone else’s emotions, it’s ethical to pay attention to how attached/emotional/vulnerable your partner is and be careful of hurting them.”

beetlejuice

8.

“Don’t view sex as a performance. instead, look at it as a chance to simply explore each other’s bodies and find out what feels good. Don’t take it too seriously – just have fun!”

9.

“Just because you’re both not moaning like a porno, doesn’t mean it isn’t good. Sometimes it’s so good it’s hard to make a sound.

Orgasms feel different depending on so many factors.

Don’t focus so much on trying to have an orgasm and actually enjoy sex.”

beetlejuice

10.

“ALWAYS PEE AFTER. ALWAYS. DO NOT WAIT. NO CUDDLES, GO PEE.”

11.

“Penises are a lot of fun, and not scary at all!”

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12.

“We are supposed to move too. The guy isn’t supposed to do everything. Try things you enjoy, move how it feels good for you. Worry about yourself and what feels good for you too.”

beetlejuice

13.

“How to say “nah I don’t really want to fuck you” and not care how they feel about that. I learned how to deal with saying that muuuuuch later into my sexual years and it kind of sucks.”

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14.

“Your first time is not guaranteed to hurt whatsoever.”

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15.

“Different positions feel better with different guys. I thought I had a favorite position, but different penises work better in different positions.”

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16.

“Don’t make sacrifices for him unless it gives you pleasure to do so. Anal, deepthroating, hard choking can be fun to the right girl, but if you aren’t that girl, don’t pretend or force yourself out of your comfort zone. The number of times I’ve tried anal for people….smh….you’re probably not going to suddenly enjoy something the 20th time.”

beetlejuice

17.

“That even very good sex is often actually LOL funny, and awkward. That your body isn’t perfect, and neither is your partner’s, and that’s fine. Your boobs or tummy or butt may hang in a way that doesn’t seem attractive to you, while your partner is obsessing about what hangs where, and what they smell like, and whether they’re doing things ‘right’ or whether birth control may be effective or ‘grandma died yesterday or what am I going to buy my boss for Christmas’. Learn to speak up and know what you want and are looking for out of a sexual experience- good partners appreciate ‘could you please go half an inch to the left?’ If a partner makes you feel unsure, or is unkind, then get out of that bed as soon as you can.

Sex is just sex. It can be romantic and heart-stopping and incredibly physically enjoyable with someone who pushes all of the right buttons for you at that moment, but even with the best of intentions, it can also be a bit silly and laugh-inducing. Unless you’re very unlucky, most partners aren’t looking to give you a number on how great you are in bed, or to rate everything about you. I’d also avoid mirrored ceilings and walls, because they just get much more funny than erotic for a lot of people.

It’s been my experience that people can get ‘good’ at the physical acts of sex with practice, but there’s a lot going for people who say ‘I’m not an expert, but if we can talk about what we want, I’m all there’.”

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