You Haunt Me

Daria Litvinova / Unsplash

You haunt me. All of me. You haunt me and it stings, it burns, it hurts. You haunt me effortlessly, you haunt me with your smile, you hold me without touch, you haunt my every thought.

Makes me feel insane… the thought of you… you never leave my mind, ever. You’re in every scenario I create in my head, on every made-up conversation that I know is never gonna happen. You haunt me, mostly in my dreams… actually, mostly before I go to sleep. Lights out, no distractions, I feel your touch, your kiss, your skin so close to mine, we become one, feeding the flames…. makes me fall for you all over again.

Why do I do this? Have I become used to having you in my system? Have I become used to the affliction? Am I obsessed with you? Have I become a masochist?

You haunt me and it kills me, drives me crazy. I could swear you’re an addiction.

I don’t want you, want you out of me completely, want to erase you, every trace and memory of you.

Funny how I say that but won’t let it happen.

I crave you, desperately crave all of you. Shows how much of a conflicted soul I am.

Is this normal?

How did it get to this? Is it just my pride? Is it the eternal doubt of wondering what could’ve been? Is it the curiosity that I will never be able to satiate?

Are you ever leaving my mind? Will these questions stop?

You haunt me, but not really. You let me go a long time ago now… so no, you don’t haunt me, this is all on me, I’m the one who lets the thought of you in, I’m the one who’s longing for your affection, your kiss, longing for you to understand that I’m worth it, wondering why you don’t see it.

Guess I want you to haunt me. All of me. Want you to haunt me ’till it stings, ’till it burns, ’till It hurts. Want you to haunt me effortlessly, want you to haunt me with your smile, want you to hold me, want you to haunt my every thought.

Guess I keep you in my mind cause it’s the closest I’ll ever be to you. TC mark

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