Your Partner Should Compliment You, Not Complete You

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You know the saying, “Two halves make a whole”? Well, technically speaking, they do. In the case of putting together a puzzle or assembling furniture from IKEA, we do need the missing pieces. But when it comes to relationships and dating, this phrase shouldn’t be taken quite so literally.

For women, we’ve been inundated with the idea that we’re not fully “complete” until we have found our mate. Older Disney movie plots have alluded that we’re in need of a man, or “Prince Charming” to save us from a dire situation.

However, real life is not like a Disney movie, and in our current day and age, we have most certainly proven that otherwise.

As forward-thinking and independent as you may be, there may still be lingering thoughts that you need a significant other to make you whole. And whether you are single, dating, in a relationship, or married, just know that’s not necessarily true. You can be a fully-functioning, strong individual without your partner by your side.

Your partner should compliment you, not complete you.

We need to reconfigure our minds from thinking that we are broken, lost, or doomed if we are not in a committed relationship. Being in a relationship should not feel like a pressured task. It should not give us anxiety, fear, or doubt, but instead make us feel uplifted, joyful, and hopeful.

If you go into a relationship already feeling like you are incomplete, then your first immediate thought should not be that the other person will complete you. That is too much pressure to put on one person and that is too much pressure to put on yourself.

What happens if there can’t always be there for you? What happens if you’re apart for an extended period of time? What happens if it doesn’t work out and you break up? Then you are right back where you started, feeling as incomplete and alone as you did before (if not, more).

The truth is, we are always alone, but at least we are all in that together.

Before involving yourself with another person, make sure that you are standing strong on your own first. At the end of the day, it’s your own two feet that are holding you up. TC mark

Writer, Runner, Singer, New Yorker

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