Thought Catalog

Finding Happiness In 5 Words

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image - Flickr / EladeManu
image – Flickr / EladeManu

I am 27-years young, and I am surprised that this has been my best year ever. With articles berating the internet about How To Be Happy In Your 20s and 100 Things To Do Before You Turn 30, and 30 Is The New 20, it constantly leads one to believe that being in your late 20s is god awful, and that you need to read self help articles to make it through these treacherous years. I am here to tell you that’s not so. When I sit back and reflect on the past 9 months of my life, it’s so plain and simple to see why this has been my best year yet. Five words – I stopped giving a fuck.

Now, that’s a harsh way to put it. And I totally get that. But that is the easiest, plainest way for me to put it to all of you sad, depressed people who are missing your golden years because you think that being in your late 20’s means that your world will soon come to an end. I am really not one for giving advice on how to live your life, because quite frankly, everyone’s life should be lived differently. But for those of you that want more insight into how not giving a fuck can make for the best year ever, here goes:

  1. I stopped caring about what anybody thinks. I spent so many years worried about what my friends, family, peers, boyfriends, and everyone else on this planet would think about my life decisions. Hell, I would worry about what they would think about my hair. I finally came to the realization that the only person’s opinion that matters is mine. Everyone else will support my decisions and me if they genuinely care about me. As for those people that aren’t supportive, fuck them. This brings me to point #2.
  2. I deleted everyone from my life that brought any type of negativity into my world. I am an inherently positive person, and I realized that ‘friends’ who were constantly bringing me down surrounded me. If you have people in your life that aren’t cheering for you and celebrating your every victory, then delete them. It’s amazing how quickly you get over not having those people around. It’s also amazing how quickly you realize how much easier life is without them, and you fill their spaces with positive people that are worth your time.
  3. I sought out new and interesting friends that are supportive, and that challenge me to be a better person. It’s a bunch of bullshit when people say it’s hard to make friends when you are in your late 20’s. It’s actually quite easy. You just need to fully put yourself out there, risk being judged or whatever it is that people fear, and go for it. I fully put myself out there, offered my friendship to others, and have made some of the most amazing friends this year that are bettering my life.
  4. Do what you want. I have never been one to listen to others, and this year I have taken it to the extreme. I do what I want, when I want, and it has been liberating. That tattoo I have always wanted but was afraid to get- I got it. That 22-year-old boy that is “too young” to date – I dated him. That night I was out with my girlfriends at 3 AM and I wanted to jump in the ocean half-naked- I did it. Why? Because that’s what makes this life fun and interesting. Go out and do the things that you want, don’t worry what anyone else will think. You will not regret it.
  5. Last but not least, do not – I repeat- do not play the game of looking at your life accomplishments and comparing them to your peers’ accomplishments. I will tell you right now, that will drive you crazy. So your BFF is married for 5 years and has 2 kids. Be happy for her! Your cousin is traveling the world? That’s amazing for her! You need to learn to be genuinely happy for others, and realize that everyone has their own life path and there is no race or comparison. Whether you are flipping burgers or flying around in a private jet- all that really matters is that you are happy with your life and that you are enjoying yourself. God knows that I wouldn’t be happy right now being married with children, and what I am doing right now is right for me.

I will leave you with one last thought. The tattoo I got during my I do what I want binge, says “Just sing.” It’s a lyric from a song by The Carpenters that my Mom sang to me as a child. The lyrics are, “Don’t worry if it’s not good enough for anyone else to hear, just sing.” Basically, don’t give a fuck if what you are doing in life if good enough for anyone else – as long as it’s good enough for you, then do your thing. TC mark

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