I Won't Go Back To You Again

I Won’t Go Back To You Again

I won’t text you back because I have moved on with my life and you’re no longer a part of it.

Contrary to what you think, I did not wither away like the faded bloom reminiscing that my prime is over. I did not stay frozen in a time capsule living in the memories of you and being convinced that you were my great love whom I had lost for good. I did not allow myself to give in to the devastation that shook me to my very core as through I would never be happy again.

I did not pine for you and I rely on myself to walk out of the darkness that you put me through.

I went to therapy and learn how to manage the emotional turmoil that you left me in. I took small tiny steps to get better. I did all I can to make sure that I am coping well in the aftermath of how shattered I was.

I won’t give you another chance because I know that I deserve better.

You have chosen her from the beginning and I was just someone you turned to out of boredom. I was just someone you wasted time with when she was away. The in-between stolen moments that ended as quickly as it began. The spark that spread uncontrollably like wildfire and which would be the ruin of me. The option you kept around but would never choose.

And I am so done with you. I am done waiting around for you to give me the time of the day. I am done giving you the power for making me feel so small and inferior. I am done letting you dictate my happiness and being miserable. 

I won’t let you back into my life because I know where my happiness lies and it has never been with you.

I have met someone else who is everything you are not. He has treated me with nothing but utmost affection and sincerity. He held my hand with no intention of letting go. His love is steadfast and never wavers in times of adversity, difficulty, and uncertainty.

He makes me happy and opens my heart to a love that would withstand the test of time and last a lifetime.

Love with him is calmness after a shipwreck. He healed my tattered and weary soul with his gentleness and he earnestly wants the best for me. Love with him is waking up after a long sleep and opening my eyes to the brilliance possibilities of building our forever together. Love with him has gradually become synonymous with calmness, joy, and happiness.

Love with him just makes me fall in love with everything. With myself that I have grown to embrace my flaws and celebrate my imperfections. With life that has become one big adventure that I’m looking forward to embarking with him. With the present that I’m trying my best to live in the moment and cherish every moment together.

Love with him is being with my best friend and there is no one else that I will rather be with. He just gets me and accepts me for who I am. There is no barrier between us and our love deepens as each day passes.

Love with him is not how it was with you, and that’s why I know, it would work out.

I write about falling in love and out of love.

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