If He Truly Wants To Be With You, He Won’t Have To Be Chased

When he says he doesn’t know what he wants, don’t think this means he will eventually fall for you. Don’t convince yourself that you’re who he’s seeking. Don’t think for a moment he will change for you. Don’t believe that there is a possibility of you and him together.

When he isn’t sure of his feelings for you, do not see it as a challenge to change his mind.

If he likes you, there won’t be any factor stopping him to be with you. He would have acted immediately to make you his. He would have climbed mountains and crossed a river to be with you. He would have stopped being so passive and indifferent to you and instead grabbed any chance he has to show you how much he cares. He would have made things clear with you and not have allowed things to progress this far without giving you a concrete answer.

When he says that he’s not ready for any sort of commitment, don’t try to read between the lines. Don’t try to analyze each word and infer what you think he means. Don’t make excuses for him, that he has a valid reason that is stopping him from having a real relationship with you. Don’t imagine a day in the future when he takes you into his arms and declares that he wants to be with you. Don’t create a perfect idealized version of him that you’ve lost touch with the reality before you.

When he breaks his promises and hurts your feelings, don’t be tempted to think that it’s a one-off thing. Don’t find excuses for him, that he doesn’t mean it when he really does because he isn’t the least remorseful. Don’t sacrifice your own needs for someone who only sees you as his option. Don’t stay stuck in the past so much that you couldn’t move towards a better future without him.

Don’t chase after someone who isn’t worth the effort and worthy of your unstoppable love. Never chase after someone who isn’t sure of you.

Make things clear to him that you’re not okay with the status quo. Leave this behind you because ultimately, it is your well-being that matters the most. Know that you have done your best and this isn’t meant to be. Acknowledge that there’s no sense in fighting for someone who never loved you.

Decide to finally move on. Close this chapter for good. Go on and live the life you wanted and fill your time with beautiful things and memories that don’t involve him.

And if he suddenly comes back and wants to try again with you, don’t take him back. Don’t for a split second think he has changed. Don’t take his words at face value since as you realized his promises meant nothing to him. Don’t get carried away picturing what could have been. Don’t allow yourself to be manipulated into giving him another shot. Don’t be soft-hearted enough to believe that this would work.

If he wants to come back, be firm about your decision to not take him back. Let him leave and don’t chase after him.

Because, as you know, the right person would not have to be chased. He would be putting in the mutual effort to keep you in his life. He would be absolutely sure that he wants to be with you. TC mark

Liane White

I write about falling in love and out of love.

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