This Is What Moving On Really Means, Because It’s Not Just Pretending You Don’t Care

moving on, confident girl, letting go
Roberto Nickson

Moving on is not for the weak.

You’re grieving for a loss that leaves you shattered and confused. You’re reeling from what happened and unable to pick yourself up. You’re dying each day slowly, as you feel a fate worse than death in having someone who loved you turn his back on you.

Moving on is when memories became obsolete and pictures become meaningless.

You start to question everything about the past. You begin to wonder if this person you feel so deeply for has ever loved you. You wonder constantly if anything of it was real.

Was ‘every I love you’ he uttered a lie? Was all the concern he shown you a performance? Were all the memories a trick of your own mind? Were you delusional for thinking you and him had something so real and precious? Were you being naive for believing in every word he said and all the promises he swore to you?

Moving on is a part of your daily life and you struggle to cope in your every waking moment.

When you open your eyes in the morning, you immediately think of him. When you go about your day, you miss him. When you receive wonderful or awful news, he’s the first person you want to share it with. When you receive a text, you long it so badly to be from him. When you think about love, you realize that he’s still the one you want to end up with.

But you’ll come to accept that moving on is necessary, however difficult it is.

Because after you take the first step, you’ll slowly realize nobody is, in fact, irreplaceable. You’ll understand that while you want him, you do not need him or anyone in your life. You cannot control who you fall for or who you love, but you can definitely control your response to falling out of it.

You may not have his love, but you will earn your own self-respect by walking away with graceful dignity.

Because you will not beg him to change his mind about you. You won’t crumble without him by your side. You won’t cease to exist without his existence in your life.

In fact, as long as you have yourself, you know that you’re going to be okay.

The journey towards healing and recovery may be shrouded in darkness right now but you know that you will reach the end. There is a fresh start awaiting you. All you have to do is to hold on to your faith that everything will work out the way it’s supposed to be.

Don’t go running back to what broke you. Don’t think for even a second that you need a relationship to feel complete.

Don’t pin all your hope in a love outside of yourself. Don’t accept a love less deserving than your big generous heart. Don’t cry for someone who had since moved on from you.

Dry your tears and hold your head up high. Focus on taking one step and the next and remember never to give up. Tell yourself that you can do this and fulfill your own promises to yourself.

That from now on, you’ll treat yourself as the most important person in your life. That you’ll not sabotage your recovery process. That you’re finally going to move on from him. TC mark

Liane White

I write about falling in love and out of love.

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