You did the right thing by walking away.
It could be that you were in an ambiguous relationship for a while, with no labels and lines drawn that left you confused and insecure. Perhaps you were in a toxic one where your kindness was taken advantage of. Maybe you were stuck in a loveless one for a long period of time, unable to take the plunge and end it.
If you’re being honest, you knew, from the depth of your heart, that you couldn’t see a future right from the start. You stuck around because you didn’t believe that you deserved better. You refused to leave because you thought his presence was all that you needed. You were scared to be alone and you just wanted someone to be there.
So you ignored your instinct to run. You neglected your own needs and put his interests above your own. You chose to delude yourself into thinking he cared. You closed your eyes to all the betrayal and lies. You didn’t heed the warnings of all your loved ones, telling you to leave.
But here is what you must know to pick yourself up.
Ultimately, the only person you should care about is yourself. Put yourself as the priority in your life. Shower yourself with so much self-love that you’re overflowing with happiness and joy. Take yourself out and enjoy your own company, so much so, that you forget your loneliness altogether.
Stop thinking that things will change for the better by taking him back for the umpteenth time. Stop believing that this is the best you can get because you deserve so much more than this. Stop changing yourself in the hopes of getting someone to love you the way you need to be loved. Stop justifying and making excuses for his behavior by believing that slowly he will grow to care for you.
You have to change your thinking so that you can break free from the past. You have to let go so that serenity and peace can find you. You have to walk away so that you realize the love you seek is found within yourself, not another person.
Be your own person by filling your life with so much positivity that it mends your fragmented heart.
Because you cannot heal your broken heart by trying so hard to move on and not letting yourself feel. You cannot get over the person who hurt you by focusing all your energy into hating them. You cannot step out of the past if your eyes are blinded by what broke you instead of how far you have come. You cannot build yourself up if you refuse to let yourself fall and accept that sometimes it is okay to be not okay.
The hardest days are the ones that build you up from within. The most excruciating pain shows you how strong you really are. The heartbreak that almost defeats you is a life lesson that teaches you more about yourself than you thought possible.
So inhale deeply and exhale all the past bitterness and resentment. Look around you in wonder and smile. Revel in what makes you happy and live in the present. Cherish the people around you and love them for being there for you.
Celebrate your recovery progress and never look back.
Because the best thing that you can do for yourself right now is to walk away.