When you left me so suddenly, I thought my word has ended.
The end of us might as well be the end of me.
For how do I wake up each morning and greet the sun when my world feels like nothing but total darkness?
How do I see the goodness and positivity radiating from everyone I meet when you- so pure and holy and unworldly cruelly rippled my heart out without any remorse?
How do I go about my life excited to build my future when everything has crumbles to dust as you shatter any hopes and dreams we have together?
I used to think that it is unthinkable to see you happy with someone else, unthinkable to be friends with you, unthinkable to think of you and not feel this sharp pain of old bitterness and overwhelming sadness, unthinkable to feel this elusive sense of peace and serenity when I hear your name.
I could not be more wrong.
Life does go on without you.
Now when I think back to us, it is as through a curtain has been lifted from my eyes. I see how wrong we were for each other. And while we might be very happy for a period of time, I realised that it might be companionship. Not love. We were young and happy. How romantic of the notion of us against the world. Us being the exception of fate. Us creating our destiny together.
Now when I think of you, I feel nothing.
Not in a bitter way. Not in a superior oh I’m so much better without you feeling. Not in a I will never forgive you manner.
I just feel nothing towards you. We are just like strangers who know each other secrets. Our chapter has closed. Our fates are no longer intertwined. Our futures are our own.
Whereas you used to make me smile, he makes me laugh. You used to promised me the world, he intend to make me his world. You are my past and he is my future.
Thank you for letting me go.
In losing you, I found myself, my future, and my love.
None of it possible with you.