At the ripe age of eleven, I would have traded my left arm if it meant becoming famous. I didn’t really care how I attained this fame, as long as it came with unlimited access to cute boys and color coordinated closets. Now, at nineteen, I still want all these things. And although I’m not ready to give up on the fantasy just yet, I’ve learned to come to terms with and even appreciate the not so famous life. Don’t get me wrong, I still dream about skipping the dreaded brunch line on any particularly crowded Sunday afternoon or being gifted designer clothes now and then. But contrary to popular belief, I’m sure these privileges lose their cool factor after a while (or so I tell myself). In the spirit of gratitude, let’s take a second and celebrate not being famous.
1. Grocery Shopping In Anything But Jeans
There’s a certain freedom that accompanies grocery shopping in pajamas. I don’t do it often, but when I do, I like to make the most of the experience. It usually follows a long day of Netflix binging when my fridge is completely empty and I’m just too lazy to put on real clothes. If you’ve never done this before, try it immediately. But don’t just throw on some measly sweatshirt and think your look is complete. Rather, slip into that one t-shirt you’ve owned since high school and your fluffiest sweat pants. Yes, others may stare at you. But really, they’re just jealous that you’re strolling through the cereal isle in what can otherwise be identified as a blanket, while they’re stuck in jeans (the worst). As non-famous people, this freedom is a luxury we often take for granted. We can strut through the sliding doors of Whole Foods in slippers and take comfort in the fact that our picture isn’t going to end up on the front page of Us Weekly or People Magazine. So for all you non-celebrities reading this article, throw on your coziest garments, head to the nearest grocery store, and enjoy your newfound liberty.
2. Breakups and Paparazzi Don’t Mix
With the recent Beyoncé and Jay Z divorce rumor circling, it got me thinking about how hard it must be to sustain a marriage in the limelight (let alone date). I’m personally choosing to ignore these rumors until Beyoncé herself gives us reason to believe otherwise. Dating and marriage are complicated enough as it is, without the added layer of fan and paparazzi involvement. I’m thankful that I can experience the perils of dating with me, myself and I, rather than with a whole crew of gossip reporters just looking to stir up trouble. Don’t get me wrong; fan support would probably be fun in small doses. But could you imagine receiving thousands of tweets from people you’ve never met before, consoling you over a breakup that until twenty minutes ago, you had no idea was even public knowledge? It’s weird. The not so glamorous perk of the non-famous life is sorting through a breakup how you see fit. Where the whole world isn’t judging your every move and the only fans you have invested in your well-being, are your closest friends.
3. Post Work Out Freedom
I usually leave the gym in one of three ways. The first, in which my hair is tied together in a messy topknot that loosely resembles the shape of a soft pretzel. The second, in which my cheeks are so flushed, that people have actually stopped me to see if I’m indeed okay, and not suffering from some sort of rare fever. And the third, in which my tank top has ridden up so far it’s more accurately considered a sports bra. I want to make something clear: I don’t purposely try to look like a disheveled mess. But somewhere in between riding the high of exercise endorphins and verging on the brink of dehydration, my appearance often becomes a secondary thought. Until of course, I catch a glimpse of my reflection in the rearview mirror while driving home. Needless to say, this got me thinking: I will never look like the ever poised Taylor Swift when leaving the gym but quite frankly, I’m kind of relieved. Not being famous affords me the luxury of exiting a work out however I please, and not having to worry that paparazzi are going to photograph me at my most vulnerable. Does this perk outweigh being gifted Wildfox sweaters on the regular? Probably not. But it’s still a perk I take pride in.
4. Sleeping on Planes
Traveling is stressful. And anyone who denies this probably hasn’t encountered an airport security line in the past decade. Once I’ve hoisted my (usually overweight) suitcase on the scale, stripped my feet of shoes at security, and stood in line for what feels like an eternity at the only Starbucks in the entire terminal, I find solace in getting to take a well needed nap on the plane. For the most part, no one cares if you sleep on the plane. Well, as long as you’re not snoring or invading anyone’s personal space per se. But see, this really only applies to non-famous people. If you’re a famous person who’s even contemplating shutting your eyes, be prepared to catch your dream like state on the likes of Twitter, Buzzfeed and pretty much all other corners of the Internet when the flight lands. The upside to anonymity is that I can seek joy in sleeping on planes for years to come without so much as a mocking comment or at the very least, an embarrassing Facebook photo upload by a friend sitting next to me.
5. Weird Phases and Other Things I Wish To Forget
I’ll never forget the day I got bangs. I remember sitting in anticipation, excitement bubbling in my stomach as the stylist snipped away at the final strands of hair above my cheek. Upon seeing the finished product, that excitement quickly turned to regret. For two years I awkwardly clipped those wavy strands above my forehead. Which at the time I thought drew attention away from the problem, when in fact it did quite the opposite. There was also the period in which I essentially sought eyeliner inspiration from a raccoon. My eyes still haven’t forgiven me yet. Luckily, evidence of these phases will never see the light of day anytime in the near future (unless someone from my past is planning to secretly blackmail me). It’s in these times that I truly appreciate the not so famous life. I’m thankful that my questionable hair and makeup mishaps are now forever confined to old high school yearbooks and memories I desperately try and block out, rather than in the tabloids for the world to scrutinize. Basically, you can go through any number of weird phases and all you really have to worry about is your closest friends questioning your life choices. Seek comfort in this blessing.